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Self Fulfillment
How to Get Anything You Want in Life Download Article Discover the secret to get what you want & need easily Explore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Ask for what you want. 2 Define your goals. 3 Visualize the outcome. 4 Prove your value. 5 Practice makes perfect. 6 Find a role model. 7 Help others to help yourself. 8 Be unapologetic. 9 Persist no matter what. 10 Leave failure in the past. 11 Believe that you'll succeed. + Show 8 more... - Show less... Other Sections Video Related Articles References Article Summary Co-authored by Sandra Possing and Glenn Carreau
Last Updated: December 14, 2024 Fact Checked
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This article was co-authored by Sandra Possing and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau. Sandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles. There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 93,266 times.
Everyone has big dreams and ambitions, and it's normal to feel overwhelmed when you're unsure how to accomplish them. Though getting what you want may seem like a long process, you can easily make a plan and start taking action right now. Remember to be confident, respectful, and have faith in yourself as you work to make your dreams a reality. To get you started, here's our comprehensive guide to getting what you want!
If you're looking specifically for getting what you want from your parents, see How to Get What You Want from Your Parents.
How to Always Get What You Want
Reflect on your dream life and write down your goals.
Break down your big goal into smaller, realistic goals.
Take the initiative and work hard to build your reputation.
Devote time to practice and improve your skills every day.
Believe in yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for what you want.
Steps
1
Ask for what you want.
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It's easy to underestimate the power of simply voicing your desires. If you can only get what you want from someone else, don't wait for them to read your mind. Ask for what you want with respect, confidence, and plenty of detail. Be detailed and specific, so there's no chance of miscommunication.[1]XResearch source
It may help to plan out what you'll say beforehand. Write down your request along with a list of reasons to help your argument. Practice speaking if you tend to get nervous jitters.[2]XResearch source
Make sure you're asking and not delivering an ultimatum. You want to make sure the other person has room to say no without feeling pressured!
If your request is denied, try not to complain or sulk. Handle it with grace, and remember that you'll probably have the chance to ask again at a later date.
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Define your goals.
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Even if you already know, get into specifics. Think about your life, career, relationships, and more. What do you want from them? What do you want in 5 years or 10? What smaller goals do you have to meet to get what you want? You'll only be able to create a solid plan for getting what you want once you have clear and detailed ideas.[3]XResearch source
It's easier to tackle your goals gradually in manageable steps. For example, if your ultimate plan is to get a raise at work, start small. Get to work early or make an effort to talk to your boss every day, and build from there!
Write down your goals. It may seem too simple, but putting pen to paper is far more powerful—and more of a commitment—than just thinking about your goals.[4]XResearch source
Go above and beyond when setting goals. Don't worry about staying "realistic" to avoid disappointment—challenge yourself and shoot for the stars.
3
Visualize the outcome.
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Gain motivation by picturing yourself in the ideal life you want to build. Think about what your life would look like, who you'd be with, how you'd feel, and what you'd be doing. Think carefully about the details of this outcome, and take a quick moment each day to breathe and visualize the future for yourself![5]XResearch source
Advertisement 4
Prove your value.
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Work hard and build your reputation to become an irreplaceable employee. Identify a key position at work that needs to be filled and take steps to fulfill it. That could mean gaining expertise in your field, increasing your productivity, or striving to be more approachable and team-oriented. Once people understand your value and see how much you do, they'll be more inclined to give you what you want.[6]XResearch source
It's also easier to ask for something you want when your track record speaks for itself!
5
Practice makes perfect.
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Commit to training often when you want to get better at something. Think about what skills you'll need to accomplish a goal and make plans to hone them. If you're saving for the vacation of a lifetime, practice your budgeting skills. If you want to book gigs at a performance space, pick songs to rehearse and improve your skills as a musician. Come up with a regular practice routine and stick to it for the best results.
On average, it takes 66 days for a person to form a habit. Keep practicing, and soon enough, you'll have an easy daily regimen that helps you work towards your ultimate goal.[7]XResearch source
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Find a role model.
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Look at people who have what you want and figure out how they got it. Odds are, whatever you want, someone else has wanted—and gotten—before. Study the challenges they overcame and what they did to make the same achievements you want to make. Use their path to success as a roadmap for your own.
Reach out and talk to this role model if you can. Ask them for advice, including questions like "What would you do differently if you could?" Be authentic and considerate when you're networking.[8]X Trustworthy Source HelpGuideNonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
7
Help others to help yourself.
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Offering to help boosts your confidence and sense of purpose.[9]X Trustworthy Source HelpGuideNonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source If you're trying to advance your career, consider volunteering your time to help coworkers and superiors. Your boss would be grateful for your help, which in turn would draw attention to both your expertise and reliability. In short: when you help people, they also want to help you.
Volunteer work can also be fulfilling if you're trying to switch careers. Use it as a chance to learn new skills and get career experience.
Helping other people makes you feel good about yourself. The more you do it, the happier you get.
Volunteering also gives you the chance to expand your professional network and meet new people. You never know when an opportunity will come along.
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Be unapologetic.
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When you apologize, you detract from your own confidence. Saying "I'm sorry, but…" to get someone's attention has become so common that some people associate it with showing respect, but it's actually just making you look less authoritative. Be polite without backing down, and remember to stop yourself when you instinctively go to apologize.[10]XResearch source
Remember that you don't need to apologize for "bothering" someone. Just say, "Is this a good time?" or "Could I have a quick word with you?" instead.
Disagree respectfully without making apologies. Rather than "I'm sorry to disagree…" try saying, "I'd like to look at this from another perspective."
9
Persist no matter what.
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Accept that you might not get what you want right away. Achieving your dreams is absolutely within your power, but it takes time and persistence. Be creative and think of new ways to tackle your goals. If you keep working at it and refuse to give up, you'll get where you want to go.
Be grateful for the little successes you have along the way. Start a gratitude journal so that you'll have a record of your accomplishments to look at on rainy days.[11]XResearch source
Advertisement 10
Leave failure in the past.
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Remember that you survived, and you deserve to succeed. If you've experienced one too many failures in the past, it may feel difficult to keep trying. Motivate yourself and push through those fears by remembering that even when things don't go your way, there's always a new possibility to explore.[12]XResearch source
Accept past failures without letting them control or define you.
Look at your failures as valuable lessons. Then, you can learn to be thankful for them, too—because those failures teach you more than the successes do.
11
Believe that you'll succeed.
Download Article
Cut out the negative self-talk and have faith in your abilities. It's easy to get preoccupied with thoughts of not being good enough, but everyone has insecurities. The next time you're feeling insecure about your chances of success, start thinking about all the reasons you're strong, capable, and already succeeding instead![13]XResearch source
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Co-authored by: Sandra Possing Life Coach This article was co-authored by Sandra Possing and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau. Sandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles. This article has been viewed 93,266 times. 46 votes - 89% Co-authors: 23Updated: December 14, 2024 Views: 93,266 Categories: Personal Goals | Self FulfillmentArticle SummaryX
In order to get what you want, decide on your goal, then break that down into smaller, more manageable steps that you can take to get there. Stay focused on your goal, and be confident that you will achieve it. For instance, if what you want is to take a vacation to Hawaii, your steps could include, “I will save $20 a week, plus my birthday money, until I can afford a ticket,” “I will spend an hour a day researching the lowest flights for the next 2 weeks,” and “Instead of going out to eat, I’ll cook at home so I can buy new clothes for the trip.” For tips on how networking can help you reach your goals, keep reading!Did this summary help you?YesNo
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Reader Success Stories
Patreau Xavier
Jan 20, 2017
"Taking action was really what helped me the most, since what I wanted was to go on vacation abroad to visit my family. Putting in a lot of work in my job and working extra hours so that I may get an early pardon/live and extend my stay was very helpful."..." more
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Yes No Advertisement Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Co-authored by: Sandra Possing Life Coach Co-authors: 23Updated: December 14, 2024 Views: 93,26689% of readers found this article helpful. 46 votes - 89% Click a star to add your vote
Patreau Xavier
Jan 20, 2017
"Taking action was really what helped me the most, since what I wanted was to go on vacation abroad to visit my family. Putting in a lot of work in my job and working extra hours so that I may get an early pardon/live and extend my stay was very helpful."..." more Share yours!
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Download Article Discover the secret to get what you want & need easily Explore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Ask for what you want. 2 Define your goals. 3 Visualize the outcome. 4 Prove your value. 5 Practice makes perfect. 6 Find a role model. 7 Help others to help yourself. 8 Be unapologetic. 9 Persist no matter what. 10 Leave failure in the past. 11 Believe that you'll succeed. + Show 8 more... - Show less... Other Sections Video Related Articles References Article Summary Co-authored by Sandra Possing and Glenn Carreau 
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Co-authored by: Sandra Possing Life Coach This article was co-authored by Sandra Possing and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau. Sandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles. This article has been viewed 93,266 times. 46 votes - 89% Co-authors: 23 Updated: December 14, 2024 Views: 93,266 Categories: Personal Goals | Self Fulfillment Article SummaryX
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501 
It's easy to underestimate the power of simply voicing your desires. If you can only get what you want from someone else, don't wait for them to read your mind. Ask for what you want with respect, confidence, and plenty of detail. Be detailed and specific, so there's no chance of miscommunication.[1] 
Even if you already know, get into specifics. Think about your life, career, relationships, and more. What do you want from them? What do you want in 5 years or 10? What smaller goals do you have to meet to get what you want? You'll only be able to create a solid plan for getting what you want once you have clear and detailed ideas.[3] 
Gain motivation by picturing yourself in the ideal life you want to build. Think about what your life would look like, who you'd be with, how you'd feel, and what you'd be doing. Think carefully about the details of this outcome, and take a quick moment each day to breathe and visualize the future for yourself![5] Advertisement 
Work hard and build your reputation to become an irreplaceable employee. Identify a key position at work that needs to be filled and take steps to fulfill it. That could mean gaining expertise in your field, increasing your productivity, or striving to be more approachable and team-oriented. Once people understand your value and see how much you do, they'll be more inclined to give you what you want.[6] 
Commit to training often when you want to get better at something. Think about what skills you'll need to accomplish a goal and make plans to hone them. If you're saving for the vacation of a lifetime, practice your budgeting skills. If you want to book gigs at a performance space, pick songs to rehearse and improve your skills as a musician. Come up with a regular practice routine and stick to it for the best results. 
Look at people who have what you want and figure out how they got it. Odds are, whatever you want, someone else has wanted—and gotten—before. Study the challenges they overcame and what they did to make the same achievements you want to make. Use their path to success as a roadmap for your own. 
Offering to help boosts your confidence and sense of purpose.[9] If you're trying to advance your career, consider volunteering your time to help coworkers and superiors. Your boss would be grateful for your help, which in turn would draw attention to both your expertise and reliability. In short: when you help people, they also want to help you. 
When you apologize, you detract from your own confidence. Saying "I'm sorry, but…" to get someone's attention has become so common that some people associate it with showing respect, but it's actually just making you look less authoritative. Be polite without backing down, and remember to stop yourself when you instinctively go to apologize.[10] 
Accept that you might not get what you want right away. Achieving your dreams is absolutely within your power, but it takes time and persistence. Be creative and think of new ways to tackle your goals. If you keep working at it and refuse to give up, you'll get where you want to go. 
Remember that you survived, and you deserve to succeed. If you've experienced one too many failures in the past, it may feel difficult to keep trying. Motivate yourself and push through those fears by remembering that even when things don't go your way, there's always a new possibility to explore.[12] 
Cut out the negative self-talk and have faith in your abilities. It's easy to get preoccupied with thoughts of not being good enough, but everyone has insecurities. The next time you're feeling insecure about your chances of success, start thinking about all the reasons you're strong, capable, and already succeeding instead![13] Advertisement 
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