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Terms of UseHow to Ask a Boy out at School Explore this Article methods 1 Approaching Your Crush 2 Making the First Move 3 Staying Confident Other Sections Expert Q&A Tips and Warnings Related Articles References Co-authored by John Keegan

Last Updated: August 5, 2025 References

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This article was co-authored by John Keegan. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been viewed 47,909 times.

You’ve finally worked up the courage to ask out the cute boy at school: now all you need is a plan! When you're feeling confident, approach your crush when he’s by himself, either in between classes, during lunch or after school. Play it safe by inviting him along to an event or a group hangout, or be bold and ask him to do something with you one on one. Think of how you are going to ask him beforehand so that all goes smoothly!

Steps

Method 1 Method 1 of 3:

Approaching Your Crush

1. 1 Approach him when he’s alone. It’s best to start talking to your crush when the two of you are relatively alone and no one can interrupt you. Try to find a chance to talk to your crush at the end of the school day, at lunch or in between classes.
   • You can also talk to him during an after-school activity like a sports practice or a play rehearsal if you both are involved in the same extra-curriculars. Talking to him outside the context of school and classes can make the conversation more relaxed and personal.
   • You can also try to catch him while he’s at his locker or while he’s walking in the halls during breaks.
   • Avoid talking to him in the middle of class where anyone can overhear!
2. 2 Smile and make eye contact.[1] When you go up to him, make sure to smile and make eye contact as you say hello. If you both have been hitting it off, he may be nervous to talk to you too! A smile shows that you’re glad to see him and will help put him at ease.
   • People are naturally drawn to optimism and positivity, which is why a smile can be such a powerful tool.
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3. 3 Start a casual conversation.[2] Instead of asking your crush out as soon as you say hi, start a conversation with your crush. Ask him something casual, like how his weekend was or what the homework is for the class you share.[3]
   • You can ask him something like, “Hi Cam, did you finish the Latin project yet?”
   • Continue the conversation by talking about shared classes or interests. Ask him a question about himself if the conversation lulls!
   • If you haven’t ever spoken very much with your crush, consider having casual conversations like this a few times before making the move to ask him out. This will give you the opportunity to get to know each other better and will make asking him out seem less abrupt.
4. 4 Compliment him.[4] Giving your crush a compliment is an innocent way to transition the conversation from casual to more personal. It’s also a subtle way to show your interest while still not being obvious. People naturally respond to flattery, so you can do no wrong by giving him a small compliment![5]
   • You can say something as simple as, “I like your shirt!” or “By the way, good job with the game on Saturday.”
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Method 2 Method 2 of 3:

Making the First Move

1. 1 Flirt with your crush. If you’re feeling bold, Flirt with your crush. There are many ways that you can flirt, both verbally and non-verbally. Flirting shows your crush that you’re interested and can help set the scene for asking him out. Flirting doesn’t have to be extreme; it can be as simple as smiling and laughing at his jokes.
   • You can use flirtatious body language like tilting your head to the side while smiling, and leaning your body slightly towards him while he’s talking.
   • If your crush says something funny, try touching his arm while you’re laughing. A little bit of physical contact goes a long way, just don’t overdo it![6]
   • Remember to maintain flirty and friendly eye contact.
2. 2 Drop a hint. If you don’t like the idea of being direct, you can indirectly ask your crush out. Bring up an event that you want to go to or a movie that you want to see. This gives your crush a window to ask if you want to go with him. [7]
   • You can say something like, “There’s this new science fiction movie that’s showing tomorrow. I wish I had someone to go with, none of my friends are sci-fi fans!”
   • Pause after you tell him about the event. This gives him time to ask you to go.
   • If he doesn’t take the bait and ask you to go with him, you can use a different approach to ask him out. He may not pick up on this subtle approach!
3. 3 Ask him for help. Another way of indirectly asking out your crush is to ask for his help outside of the context of school. For instance, you could ask him to help you on a homework project or ask him if he could tutor you. This is a way of asking him to hang out without being obvious that you like him.[8]
   • Only ask for help if you really do need help with something. Don’t pretend to be worse at a subject than you really are just to get your crush as a private tutor; starting things off with a lie never ends well.
4. 4 Invite your crush to a party or group event. If you want to be more direct about asking out your crush, invite him to come to an event with you, whether it be a house party or a group brunch with your friends. Asking him to hang out in the context of a group puts less pressure on you and makes it more of a casual date.[9]
   • This works especially well if you have mutual friends because then your crush is sure to feel at ease.
   • If you ask him to hang out in a group instead of hanging out alone, there’s the possibility that he may think you just want to be friends. This isn’t a reason not to ask him this way; you may just have to amp up your flirting when you do hang out!
5. 5 Ask your crush to hang out one on one.[10] If you are feeling bold, simply ask your crush to do something with you, whether that means going to a movie together or going to your favorite restaurant.[11]
   • You can simply say, “I was wondering if you want to go to a movie sometime,” or, “There’s a new restaurant that just opened up in town, do you want to check it out with me?”
   • You don’t need to use the word “date”. Just ask him if he wants to hang out and he will realize that you are asking him out.
6. 6 Ask him out in a creative way. You don’t always have to go the conventional route when you ask out your crush. Consider making a big gesture, especially if you're asking your crush out to an event like homecoming or prom. Making a big gesture can be nerve-wracking but it can also be extremely memorable and effective!
   • Make your crush a cake and decorate it so it says, “Will you go out with me?” or “Will you go to Prom with me?”
   • Write a song asking your crush out and perform it or record it for your crush.
   • Carve a message for your crush in the snow!
   • Make a scavenger hunt for your crush that leads to a note asking him out.
   • It's best to make a big gesture like this if you and your crush have already been talking for a while and know each other well.
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Method 3 Method 3 of 3:

Staying Confident

1. 1 Spend extra time on your appearance. On the day you decide to ask out your crush, spend some extra time getting ready in the morning. Knowing that you look your absolute best will help give you the confidence you need to ask out your crush.
   • Wear an outfit that you know you look good in, but that still is comfortable.
   • If you're a girl, spend time doing your hair and your makeup. Aim for a look that will last all day rather than one that needs readjusting.
   • If you're a guy, comb your hair and make sure to wear clothes that look good on you.
2. 2 Don’t overdress. Asking out your crush is definitely a special occasion, but don’t dress in a way that is too formal or over-the-top for school. Aim to be casual and cute, rather than dressing for the red carpet![12]
   • Also try not to wear clothes that are tighter or more revealing that what your normally wear!
3. 3 Have a general idea of what you are going to do and say. Think about how you want to approach your crush and when in the day it would be best to talk to him. If you have a general plan, you’re less likely to get flustered or sidetracked when you see him.
   • You don’t need to have an exact plan of the conversation that you’ll have with him, since conversations are fluid and you can’t plan for everything! Just know where you’re planning to talk to him and how you’re going to ask him to hang out.
4. 4 Give yourself a pep talk. Before you approach your crush, spend a minute pumping yourself up. Think about everything about yourself that makes you proud and that distinguishes you from the other people at school.
   • Try to visualize yourself confidently going up to your crush and asking him out. Even simple visualization is a powerful tool that can give you courage![13]
   • Remember that the worst thing that can happen is that he'll say no, and that everyone gets rejected somewhere along the line.
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Expert Q&A

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• Question How should I ask my crush out at school? John Keegan Dating Coach John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. John Keegan Dating Coach Expert Answer Find a time to approach them where you can talk one-on-one for a few minutes. Start with casual conversation before asking them if they want to go out sometime. Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 8 Helpful 25
• Question If your asking a boy out then how are you supposed to do it without your parents knowing? Community Answer Don't invite your crush over to your house or introduce him to your parents, or else they may realize that you asked him out. Also be sure to tell your friends not to blab to your parents! Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 16 Helpful 89
• Question I have a boy that I like and he always smiles at me and flirts with me, does he like me? Community Answer Your crush may very well like you if he's always flirting with you! Don't be afraid to make the first move and ask him out! Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 10 Helpful 71

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Tips

• Try to build up your relationship with your crush before asking him out! If you don’t know him too well, take a couple weeks to talk with him and get to know his friends. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
• If you’re crush rejects you, remember that it’s not the end of the world. You’ll find someone you like and who wants to be with you. If anything, be proud that you had the courage to ask him out! Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
• Don't rush the relationship. If you rush it, he might think you are too eager and needy. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

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References

1. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
2. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
3. ↑ https://www.enkivillage.org/how-to-get-your-crush-to-like-you.html
4. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
5. ↑ http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/10-simple-ways-to-flirt-better_8.html
6. ↑ https://www.glamour.com/gallery/flirting-101#8
7. ↑ http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/g2216/how-to-ask-a-guy-out/
8. ↑ http://slism.com/girlstalk/how-to-flirt-with-a-guy-to-get-him-to-like-you.html
9. ↑ http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/g2216/how-to-ask-a-guy-out/

More References (4)

10. ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
11. ↑ http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/g2216/how-to-ask-a-guy-out/
12. ↑ http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/a5046/how-to-get-guys-to-flirt/
13. ↑ http://greatist.com/grow/easy-confidence-boosters

About this article

Co-authored by: John Keegan Dating Coach This article was co-authored by John Keegan. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. This article has been viewed 47,909 times. 23 votes - 78% Co-authors: 24 Updated: August 5, 2025 Views: 47,909

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Yes No Advertisement Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Co-authored by: John Keegan Dating Coach 23 votes - 78% Click a star to vote Co-authors: 24 Updated: August 5, 2025 Views: 47,909

Elizabeth Hazell

Oct 20, 2020

"This was really helpful, I feel much more calm now. Thanks wikiHow!"

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"Thanks, I really think it helped me find the one. "

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