Ask Jigsaw: I Ruin Everything | Advice For Young People

Skip to content Close Search Search Jigsaw Enter your keywords to search the site: Popular searches Resources Anxiety Anger Self-harm HomeBlogAsk Jigsaw: I ruin everything Back Ask Jigsaw Q&AInformation and resourcesStressWorry Ask Jigsaw: I ruin everything

Ask Jigsaw: I ruin everything

16/07/2020 Time to read: 01 min

How do I accept to love myself when I hate everything about me and want to change everything.

How do I accept to love myself when I hate everything about me and want to change everything about me and feel I ruin everything I just want to be normal. Anon1.

Hi Anon1,

I’m sorry to hear that nothing feels right for you at the moment. Sometimes, it can feel like everyone else is doing well, and we are the only one struggling.

Linda Jigsaw Clinician It’s equally important to notice the things that we like about ourselves

“Love yourself” is a message we are often given. It can feel like we are failing if we don’t love every little thing about ourselves. Actually, it’s completely normal not to always love certain parts of ourselves. Sometimes, it can even be helpful to notice some things that we would like to change.

However, it’s equally important to notice the things that we like about ourselves. It sounds like you are struggling to acknowledge the good things about yourself. It might be useful to learn some ways that you could deal with self-criticism here.

Unhelpful Thinking

As humans, we can’t think logically 100% of the time. We can often fall into unhelpful ways of thinking about things. It sounds like you are assuming responsibility for ruining “everything”. Maybe you have had a part to play in something that’s gone wrong but, it’s likely that other people had a part to play too. It’s not helpful for us to assume that the negative things that happen to us are all our fault.

It can be really helpful to speak to a friend or family member about how you are feeling. While you might feel like they are “normal” and you are not, it’s likely that you will find some shared experiences.

If the way that you feel about yourself has a negative impact on your life and the things you do, you might like to think about getting some help or support.

Best wishes,

Linda, Jigsaw Clinician

Published by Eve Donnelly Share On: Facebook X WhatsApp Email Copy Link Previous article Next article

Related news

Read more AnxietyInformation and resourcesRelationships

Ask Jigsaw: Loss of confidence

16/07/2020 Time to read: 02 mins

I’ve always been an anxious person but over the past year I have noticed myself it has gotten worse due to certain experiences

Read more Read more Body Image

Body image and mental health

16/07/2020 Time to read: 04 mins

A negative body image can have an impact on our mental health. Learn about body image and building body confidence.

Read more Read more Asking for helpCollegeInformation and resourcesSchool

How do I access Jigsaw?

16/07/2020 Time to read: 02 mins

Are you aged between 12 to 25 looking to get one-on-one support with your mental health? If so, your local Jigsaw service can help.

Read more Read more

Sign up to our newsletter

Keep up to date with what’s going on with young people’s mental health in Ireland

Sign up to newsletter Overlay X Back To Top Close