Here Comes The Pun: 300+ Best Jokes For Kids - Tinybeans

61. Why do shrimp never share?They're so shellfish.

62. What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?A tuba toothpaste.

63. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?Because she wanted to go to high school.

64. Where do vampires keep their money?A blood bank.

65. What do elves learn in school?The elf-abet.

66. What do you call a dog magician?A labracadabrador.

67. Where do pencils go on vacation?Pencil-vania.

68. Why couldn't the pony sing a lullaby?She was a little horse.

69. What do you cakes and baseball have in common?They both need a batter! 

70. What gets wetter the more it dries?A towel.

71. What do you call two bananas?Slippers.

And speaking of bananas...

72. Why did the banana go to the doctor?Because it wasn’t peeling well.

73. Why was the mushroom the life of the party?It was a fungi.

74. What stays in the corner yet can travel all over the world?  A stamp.

75. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?With a pumpkin patch.

76. What kind of award did the dentist receive?A little plaque.

77. What do you call a funny mountain?Hill-arious.

78. What should you drink while singing nursery rhymes?Hot Cocomelon.

79. Why do bees have sticky hair?Because they use a honeycomb.

Related: 30 Wacky Winter Jokes for Kids

80. What did the big flower say to the little flower?Hi, bud!

81. There are two robots sitting on a wall. They are named Pete and Re-Pete. Pete falls off. Who is left?(Re-Pete...so you repeat the whole thing again and again and again.)

—Henrik P., 10 

82. What is a pony’s favorite juice?She really likes lemon-neigh’d.

—5-year-old Kerrigan

83. Where do fish keep their money?In the River-Bank!

—Jaxon G., 7 y.o.

84. What do you call an alligator with a vest?An investigator!

—Milo H-R, age 8

85. Why was the computer cold?It left its window open!

—Milo H-R, age 8

86. Knock knock!Who’s there?Boo.Boo who?Don’t cry!

—Milo H-R, age 8

87. In baseball, would it take longer to run from 1st to 2nd base or 2nd to 3rd base?2nd to 3rd base because there’s a shortstop in between.

—Milo H-R, age 8

88. What has lots of leaves but never actually grew?A book!

—Milo H-R, age 8

89. Why was the computer cold?It had a virus. 

—Henrik, age 10 

90. Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?Because he couldn’t see himself doing it.

—Jan L. 

91. Who keeps the ocean clean?The mer-maid.

—Jan L. 

92. What did the astronaut say when he crashed into the moon? "I Apollo-gize."

93. Why didn’t the orange win the race?It ran out of juice.

94. What dinosaur had the best vocabulary?  The thesaurus.

95. What did one DNA strand say to the other DNA strand?Do these genes make my butt look big?

96. Why aren’t dogs good dancers?They have two left feet.

97. What did the wolf say when it stubbed its toe?Owwwww-ch! (by Henrik, age 5)

98. Kid: What are you doing under there?Mom: Under where?Kid: Ha ha! You said underwear!!

99. Why did Johnny throw the clock out of the window?Because he wanted to see time fly.

100. What did one toilet say to the other? You look flushed.