How To Kiss A Boy For The First Time: 13 Steps (with Pictures) - WikiHow

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Terms of Use wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Learn why people trust wikiHow How to Kiss a Guy for the First Time PDF download Download Article Find out what to do before, during, & after your first kiss Co-authored by Eddy Baller and Bertha Isabel Crombet, PhD

Last Updated: January 20, 2026 Fact Checked

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  • Before the Kiss
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  • During the Kiss
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  • After the Kiss
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  • Final Takeaways
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  • Q&A
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  • Tips
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  • Warnings
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This article was co-authored by Eddy Baller and by wikiHow staff writer, Bertha Isabel Crombet, PhD. Eddy Baller is a men’s dating coach and founder of Conquer and Win, a Vancouver-based service that helps men break free from loneliness and meet the women they truly want. Since 2011, he has coached men to overcome approach anxiety, spark real attraction, and build meaningful relationships—without relying on dating apps, gimmicks, or luck. Through both online sessions and in-person coaching, Eddy gives live feedback as clients meet women in everyday places, making confidence feel natural and conversations effortless. His mission is simple: to help men get into meaningful, long-term relationships. There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 4,155,412 times.

If you have a crush on a boy and he likes you back, you may want to take your relationship to the next level and kiss. Kissing a boy for the first time can be scary, but it doesn’t have to be. Even if you don’t know exactly what to do, learning can be fun! We’ve compiled tons of tips on how to kiss a boy for the first time, including advice on technique and how to prepare for the kiss from professional dating coaches.

How to Kiss a Boy for the First Time

Make sure your breath is fresh. Dress nicely so you look and feel confident, and try to find the perfect time and place. Flirt to build tension by subtly touching his arm. Lean in, close your eyes, and try to mostly use your bottom lip. Open your eyes when you pull away.

Steps

Section 1 of 4:

Preparing For the Kiss

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  1. Step 1 Keep your breath fresh. 1 Keep your breath fresh. Fresh breath is important because you want to give your crush as many excuses as possible to keep kissing you. Try using Lifesavers or mints, and always brush your teeth before you meet up with him. Remember, bad breath isn't the end of the world, but practice good hygiene to avoid it if you can.[1]
    • Try not to eat strong, spicy, or garlicky food before you see him.

    Meet the wikiHow Experts

    Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada.

    Connell Barrett is a Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, as well as the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City.

    John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City with over 15 years of professional experience.

  2. Step 2 Put effort into your appearance. 2 Put effort into your appearance. You can't always plan when and where you'll kiss a boy, but you can try to be prepared. If you're dressed up in a stylish way that makes you feel comfortable, you'll have a spring in your step. That means you’re likely to be more confident, and more confidence is usually a sign of more kisses to come.[2]
    • Try not to wear lip gloss or lipstick as they’ll rub off on your partner, making him look sparkly or sloppy, depending on the situation. Stick with lip balm instead.
    • Don't wear a bunch of accessories that could get in the way of the kiss, like hats or scarves.
    • Wear your hair up or out of your face. You may want to try kissing the boy when you have your hair up, so that he focuses only on you and the kiss, not the hair tickling his face.
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  3. Step 3 Seek out the perfect place and time. 3 Seek out the perfect place and time. Dating coach Connell Barrett sets the scene for a perfect first kiss: “This person is looking at you, making deep eye contact with you, and their body language is leaning in and matching yours. There are pauses in the conversation, but they're not awkward; they're romantically tense. You’ll hear that little voice inside saying, ‘It's time to kiss,’ and that's when you lean in.”[3]
    • Public places are generally not so good for the first kiss, as you can get people staring at you or even heckling you.
    • Try to find a place that's public, but still intimate, for you to share your first kiss.
  4. Step 4 Flirt to build tension. 4 Flirt to build tension. Flirting with him physically can help get the kiss ball rolling. This will not only make him understand that you like him, but will also give him some time to adjust to you, so that you're not going from 0 to 100 in a second. Dating coach Eddy Baller says, “Start with a little bit of light physical contact, like massaging hands, moving up the arm, and building up the level of intimacy.” He says that doing ahead of the kiss will let you know how comfortable the other person is with physical touch and should help you know what to do.[4]
    • Start with a little bit of light physical contact to try and basically build up the level of intimacy.[5]
    • Hold his hand or put your arms over his shoulders. Start moving your body so that he's much closer to you; it'll be awkward if you have to move a long way to kiss him.
    • Touch his hair or face to make him know that you are interested. Gently touch his nose with your pointer finger and smile at him.
    • You can even try hugging him first, and while you're still hugging him, lean back and go in for the kiss. This creates a connection from the very moment you hug.
  5. Step 5 Make sure you’re both ready. 5 Make sure you’re both ready. Before taking this next step, make sure both of you are ready for this new level of intimacy, physically and emotionally. Kissing says "I like you more than just a friend," and it's sometimes hard to save a friendship after you have a relationship. If you're not sure whether you're doing the right thing, wait until you absolutely know.
    • Look him in the eye. While he's watching you, look slowly towards his lips and back again. If he does the same to you, then he's ready. If he looks a bit uncomfortable and looks away, it's best to leave it for a while.
    EXPERT TIP John Keegan

    John Keegan

    Dating Coach John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. John Keegan John Keegan Dating Coach

    Ease into your first kiss. Start with a casual touch, like holding hands. As comfort grows, progress to a gentle arm around the shoulder. Read his body language–sustained eye contact and corresponding touch are positive signs. If all feels right, lean in slowly and wait for his response.

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Section 2 of 4:

What to do During the Kiss

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  1. Step 1 Move your lips towards him slowly, closing your eyes at the last second. 1 Move your lips towards him slowly, closing your eyes at the last second. You need to be able to see so that you can aim for his lips, but you don't want to keep your eyes open while you kiss, so close them right before your lips lock.[6]
    • Keep your eyes closed during the whole kiss. When the kiss ends, you can open your eyes, and you gently pull away.
    • Move into the kiss at an angle. That means if his face is straight up and down, you probably want yours tilted a bit to the left or right, whichever is more comfortable. This helps keep you from bumping noses together when you kiss.
  2. Step 2 Use mostly your lower lip. 2 Use mostly your lower lip. Don't pucker up your lips like you've just had a bunch of Sour Patch Kids, or like you're kissing grandma. Keep your lips loose and try to relax. Breathe in and out gently through your nose. Try not to breathe into his throat or onto his lips.[7]
    • Give him one long kiss. You don't have to do anything fancy to get his attention the first time.
    • Your goal is to get him to come back for seconds. Try to keep the first kiss to under 20 seconds if you can.
    • Don't French kiss on the first kiss. The French kiss is advanced, so save it for when you really want to blow his mind.
  3. Step 3 Go for a gentle parted-lip kiss. 3 Go for a gentle parted-lip kiss. This just means opening your lips a bit and maybe kissing his lower lip with both of your lips. Don't make it last too long — about 5 seconds — and be prepared to pull away soon.
  4. Step 4 Close your eyes. 4 Close your eyes. This may sound like a no-brainer and something you’re likely to do naturally anyway, but you should close your eyes during the kiss as it sets the appropriate romantic tone. Someone who kisses with their eyes open may give the impression that they’re shocked or uncomfortable. You also want to avoid making eye contact with your crush during your first kiss, and keeping your eyes closed reduces the risk of awkwardness for both of you. Win-win!
  5. Step 5 Wrap your arms around his back or neck. 5 Wrap your arms around his back or neck. Show him open body language during the kiss, like hugging him around the torso or neck, and leaning into his body. If he puts his hands around your back or waist, it could mean that he’s really enjoying the kiss and you. Baller suggests going for the hips or hands during a kiss, which both work in standing and sitting positions. He adds, “Turn to each other a little bit at a 45-degree angle, so you reach over and grab her hand during the kiss.”[8]
    • If he plays with your hair or gently strokes your cheek, it's a sign that he's very in touch with his feelings, and he definitely likes you.
    • Remember to try to keep your eyes closed the whole time. No peeking! Your attention should be entirely on his lips and the kiss.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 1481 wikiHow readers if using their hands while kissing makes the experience better, and 95% of them said yes. [Take Poll]
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Section 3 of 4:

What to Do After the Kiss

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  1. Step 1 Open your eyes as you pull away. 1 Open your eyes as you pull away. Now would be the time to take a look at the boy you've just shared a kiss with. If you did a good job, he'll be flushed, heavy-eyed, and smiling.[9]
    • Smile back at him. He may be nervous about how he kissed, so you'll probably want to convince him that he did a good job. You can do this by smiling.
    • If your arms are still around him, leave them there for a few seconds before taking them away. It might feel weird if you suddenly take your hands away as soon as the kiss is done.
  2. Step 2 Compliment him or the kiss. 2 Compliment him or the kiss. Sometimes, the kiss itself is enough of a statement. Other times, however, it wouldn’t hurt to say a little something after the kiss, like, "You're a good kisser," or, "I've been wanting to do that for a long time." You might also tell him how good he smells, how soft his lips are, or how nice it feels to press your body into his. Hot new couple alert? We think so!
    • You can also try saying something like, “I hope there’s more where that came from,” or, “That was nice, but I think we should try that again to be sure” for a bit more cheekiness.
  3. Step 3 Listen to your heart. 3 Listen to your heart. So, you've finally kissed the boy that you've been dying to kiss for the last six months. What now? You have a few options. For one, if you liked the kiss, you could wait for him to make the next move. If you went in for the first kiss, maybe you think it's his turn to initiate the next kiss. Be yourself, do what you normally do, but be extra friendly and encouraging around him. He should try to kiss you again. However, remember that the more you kiss, the higher the chances this could lead to a relationship. Other options include:
    • You could also try kissing him again whenever you want to. Maybe you don't care that much about who kisses whom, as long as there's kissing! That's fine, just make sure that he's into it, too.
    • Break off the kissing. Maybe he wasn't that good of a kisser, or he touched you in the wrong place, or you just get a bad feel from him. That's okay, too! Try to still be friendly around him, but don't put yourself in situations (i.e. one-on-one, private setting) where he could kiss you again.
  4. Step 4 Don’t spread gossip or germs. 4 Don’t spread gossip or germs. There are some unspoken rules that you should know about when beginning your kissing journey. Pay attention and try to follow them if at all possible. They include not kissing and telling, and not kissing when you’re sick, as you don’t want to spread germs.
    • Kissing and telling can be very easy to do. That doesn't mean it's right. What goes on between you and your crush is between you and your crush. Try not to gossip too much about it.
    • Kissing is a very intimate thing, but that doesn't mean that your kissing partner wants every single part of you, including your cold. Try not to kiss when you are feeling under the weather.
    • Kiss one person, not everyone. Kissing may be fun, but that doesn't mean that it sends the right message to go out and kiss everyone you want. Focus on one person you really like, try things out, and then move on to someone else if that doesn't work out. You'll be appreciated a lot more, and you'll probably be happier.
  5. Step 5 Practice makes perfect. 5 Practice makes perfect. Don’t be disappointed if your first kiss isn’t the fireworks you thought it would be. Some, if not most, first kisses can be awkward and nerve-wrecking, so don’t beat yourself up too much if you’re not impressed by your— or his— performance. Baller says, “Practice makes perfect. So you're gonna want to kiss a lot to get good at kissing, and you can.” He offers a basic rule for kissing is to “match your partner,” whatever his movements are. Hopefully, he says, it’ll be like “yin and yang, the way they fit together nicely like that.”[10]
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Section 4 of 4:

Final Takeaways

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  1. Kissing a boy is fun as long as you know what to expect. Kissing a boy is fun as long as you know what to expect. Make sure that he is someone you know and trust, who is worthy of your affections. Try to relax and remember that you’re not supposed to be a kissing expert overnight. It takes practice, just like learning to play an instrument or riding a bike does. Everyone goes at their own pace and all of your more “experienced” friends were beginners once, too.

Join the Discussion...

I learned the average age for a first kiss is 15... WikiRiverDancer770 WikiRiverDancer770 I'm 25 and haven't had my first kiss yet. I can't help but feel like I'm behind :( I feel hopless about my love life. Am I just doomed to be alone forever? How do I have my first kiss? Read More WikiStoatWatcher675 WikiStoatWatcher675 Hey, I'm 32 and I didn't have my first kiss until I was 26. It was with my very first girlfriend and she's now been my wife for 2 years! She makes me incredibly happy and I'm so grateful to have her in my life. It's easy to compare yourself to other people but know that trying to treat averages like guidelines for how to live your life will just make you miserable. Everyone goes through life at their own pace and when the time is right you'll have your first kiss. Read More wikiHow Editorial Team wikiHow Editorial Team While 15 might be the average age according to some sources, there are plenty of people who were older than that when they had their first kiss. If you haven't had one yet, it doesn't mean you're behind and you're definitely not doomed to be alone forever! Try not to compare yourself to others. Everyone has their own timeline and journey. When you meet someone you connect with, your first kiss will happen naturally—and it will be worth the wait. Read More See all 284 Replies and Read Discussion

Avoid Awkward Kisses with this Expert Series

Are you worried about having a bad kiss? These expert articles will build your confidence and help you avoid awkward situations. 1 - Refuse a Kiss 1 Refuse a Kiss 2 - Kiss a Shy Boyfriend 2 Kiss a Shy Boyfriend 3 - Move in Effectively for a Kiss 3 Move in Effectively for a Kiss 4 - Kiss on a Dare 4 Kiss on a Dare 5 - Avoid a Kiss 5 Avoid a Kiss 6 - How to Avoid an Awkward First Kiss 6 How to Avoid an Awkward First Kiss

Community Q&A

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  • Question What's wrong with keeping our eyes open while kissing? Community Answer Community Answer It's not "wrong" to keep your eyes open during a kiss; however, scientific studies have found that it's difficult to focus on physical sensations (e.g., kissing) when your eyes are focused on something else, so closing them helps you and your partner to focus on how the kiss feels. (There's also the fact that extended eye contact can feel awkward or frightening to some people, and when you kiss, your eyes are level with your partner's; if your eyes are open, you're forced to make eye contact.) Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 76 Helpful 722
  • Question What if he backs away when I kiss him? Community Answer Community Answer Backing away means he's not interested in kissing you - it's body language for "I'm uncomfortable with this" or "You're invading my personal space, please back away." Before you kiss someone, it's generally a good idea to lean in a bit and give the other person a moment before you actually go in for the kiss; if he takes the moment to back away, turn his head away or starts talking, that means he doesn't want to kiss and you should pull back. Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 67 Helpful 636
  • Question What age do I have to be to kiss a boy? Community Answer Community Answer It would depend on who you ask, but there's no real right answer. Some people would recommend waiting until you're in middle school or high school, while others might say to just wait until you feel ready. Talk to your parents about whether they have rules on when you're allowed to start dating, and don't feel pressured to kiss anyone before you're ready. Thanks! We're glad this was helpful. Thank you for your feedback. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow Yes No Not Helpful 152 Helpful 793
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Tips

  • Don't lick your lips before you kiss. You don't want a wet kiss. Thanks Helpful 123 Not Helpful 18
  • Make sure your heads are tilting in different directions, or else your noses will push together. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
  • If you are not comfortable with a long kiss like suggested in this article, it is fine to lean up to your crush and plant a quick peck on their lips, with your eyes closed. Then pull back and see if he was comfortable with it. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
Show More Tips Submit a Tip All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published Name Please provide your name and last initial Submit Thanks for submitting a tip for review! Advertisement

Warnings

  • If you feel uncomfortable, you have the right to pull away at any time. Don't do anything that you don't want to do! Thanks Helpful 2 Not Helpful 0
  • Wait until you’re 100% ready to kiss someone. You don’t have to kiss them just because you’ve started dating them. Thanks Helpful 2 Not Helpful 0
  • If you feel like he crossed a physical boundary and touched you without your consent, you have every right to tell him not to do it again and to end the relationship or friendship. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
  • Remember: not kissing them yet doesn't mean the end of the relationship— or the world. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 1
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References

  1. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/17771-bad-breath-halitosis
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201310/does-everyone-find-confidence-attractive
  3. Connell Barrett. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
  4. Eddy Baller. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
  5. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201202/how-flirt-and-seduce-touch-part-1
  6. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/affairs-of-the-lips-why-we-kiss/
  7. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-asymmetric-brain/202102/the-kissing-brain-investigating-the-neuroscience-romance
  8. Eddy Baller. Dating Coach. Expert Interview
  9. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-science-of-love/201210/the-very-first-kiss-momentous-or-disastrous
More References (1)
  1. Eddy Baller. Dating Coach. Expert Interview

About This Article

Eddy Baller Co-authored by: Eddy Baller Dating Coach This article was co-authored by Eddy Baller and by wikiHow staff writer, Bertha Isabel Crombet, PhD. Eddy Baller is a men’s dating coach and founder of Conquer and Win, a Vancouver-based service that helps men break free from loneliness and meet the women they truly want. Since 2011, he has coached men to overcome approach anxiety, spark real attraction, and build meaningful relationships—without relying on dating apps, gimmicks, or luck. Through both online sessions and in-person coaching, Eddy gives live feedback as clients meet women in everyday places, making confidence feel natural and conversations effortless. His mission is simple: to help men get into meaningful, long-term relationships. This article has been viewed 4,155,412 times. 8 votes - 80% Co-authors: 283 Updated: January 20, 2026 Views: 4,155,412 Categories: Featured Articles | Relationships Article SummaryX

To make your first kiss with a boy as fun and romantic as possible, take a little time to prepare ahead if you can. Brush your teeth or use a breath mint, and put on a little lip balm to soften your lips. Find a quiet, private place where you can get up close and personal without being distracted or interrupted. To set the mood, flirt with your guy a little bit before going in for the kiss. Look for romantic ways to break the touch barrier, like holding his hand, stroking his hair or face, or putting an arm around him. When the moment seems right, lock eyes with him and move your face close to his. If he’s feeling it, he’ll probably lean in, too. But if you’re not sure, you can always ask him. Say something like, “I really want to kiss you right now. Is that okay?” Once you get the green light, close your eyes, tilt your head slightly to one side, and gently press your lips to his. Keep your lips relaxed and slightly parted instead of puckering up. As you kiss him, you can also put your arms around his waist, caress his arms or shoulders, or stroke his hair and face with your hands. Let the kiss linger for about 5 seconds, and remember to breathe in and out through your nose. When you’re done, gently pull back a little bit. Open your eyes, make eye contact with him, and smile. If you enjoyed the kiss, give his confidence a boost by saying something like, “That was amazing,” or “You’re such a good kisser.” From there, you can either move on with your conversation or turn it into a longer make out session—just try to relax and do whatever feels natural. For more tips, including how to compliment a boy after kissing him for the first time, read on! Did this summary help you?YesNo

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