How To Raise A Gentleman: A Civilized Guide To Helping Your Son ...
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Zak Boston152 reviews10 followersFollowFollowDecember 29, 2024A bit light on instruction and a bit heavy on description, but entertaining and some quality advice throughoutIn the modern age of men who are not gentlemen and women who are not ladies, this reminder of basic decorum is well putSome highlightsBe consistentDo not give in to temper tantrums If the tantrum is public, take him to another room or outsideDo not respond with similar behavior, do not hit him to stop him from hittingDo your best to not raise your voice in angerIf you lose your temper with your child, apologizeAccept apologies gracefully and quicklyDo not correct other children on their mannersCorrect in private, celebrate in publicDo not promise rewards for good behavior, instead give a treat upon a successful episodeGive your son tasks and involve him in decisions to the degree he is physically or mentally able as soon as he is able and no soonerLet your child know when a discussion has become a decisionBe a gracious loser and a generous winner Do not respond to rudeness with rudenessGive more than you are askedTake less than you needLeave a place nicer than you found it
Mark McElreath139 reviews3 followersFollowFollowDecember 28, 2024"How to Raise a Gentleman" points out what should be clear and accepted behavior for young men. From navigating sports fields to written correspondence, West covers key events and skills every young gentleman should seek to master. The work does feel redundant, as many of these lessons are universally understood, but in a day where common sense is not so common, it may be best that it is written down. 
Karisa377 reviews11 followersFollowFollowJuly 5, 2018A thorough, humorous guide to raising gentlemen. My only beef is that the author only had one son! And when she wrote this, her son was still young, so the jury wasn't out yet on whether he'd become a gentleman or not. I think the book would've had more power if it had been written by a veteran mom who'd successfully raised several boys into gentlemen. This book captured the image of WHAT a young gentleman looks and acts like, but I was often frustrated wanting answers about HOW to make that happen. Agency is in play, unfortunately-- I could talk to my 3 boys until I'm blue in the face about what a gentleman does, but since that isn't their goal, they could care less.
B-right110 reviewsFollowFollowNovember 24, 2012 As a gentleman, I must thank the writer for putting together these honorable pieces. When I started, I first taught it was a book meant for kids and not for grown up singles like me but have made me more a gentleman as I practice some few tips from it. Am now on my way to getting 'how to raise a lady' since I will soon be a father.Thank you Mrs. West.
Trace1,031 reviews39 followersFollowFollowFebruary 16, 2014With my highlighter in hand, I've underlined lots of areas where I can see my son will need a bit more practice in. I felt that this book was filled with examples of gentlemanly behaviors but a bit short on practical suggestions for practice and implementation... Still - I think it will prove to be useful to our family. 
Daryl Ngo49 reviewsFollowFollowOctober 19, 2015A manual that every adult needs to read because not only children could learn from this but adults too. Whether you're planning to be a parent or not, this is 101.
Megan2,754 reviews13 followersFollowFollowJanuary 9, 2020This is largely helpful, if rather succinct, advice on raising a child to have good manners. To be honest, very little of it has to do with that child being male; it’s worthwhile for any human. It seems more relevant for a younger child, but it can still be helpful for any parent. West manages to keep all her talk and advice about proper manners grounded in real life. 
DaShannon1,299 reviews34 followersFollowFollowJune 6, 2025This is a great book about etiquette and manners to impart to our sons. It includes information for toddlers as well as older sons. Dining, friends, girlfriends, culture, social interactions, sportsmanship, and lots of other areas are covered. 
Tuấn Ngô1 reviewFollowFollowApril 17, 2021To my son: read it, boy.Ashley Castillejo1 reviewFollowFollowDecember 20, 2025A fun and easy to read book. Witty, honest, and heartfelt. It reminds us of how we should treat people in this life, and when or if I have kids someday, that they can learn these valuable lessons. 
Elena673 reviews18 followersFollowFollowApril 30, 2021A book on manners and comportment, this book goes into various topics such as teaching the basics (please, thank you, excuse me; using Sir, Miss, etc) to proper introductions, greetings, and leavings, to respectful behavior while in public areas, the ins and outs of playdates, sleepover, and birthday party manners, dining out, traveling, telephone manners, good sportsmanship, written correspondence (thank you cards), and temper tantrums. There are some helpful tips and overall good recommendations for training your son to be a respectful gentleman. I didn't get way too much out of it because most of the book included topics addressed in a similar book I read last fall (that I preferred to this one) called Connoisseur Kids by Jennifer Scott. I felt like that book was a bit more practical for the younger years that I find myself with my son and included a ton of fun activities to help teach the manners whereas this book just felt like a long, tedious list of dos and don'ts with a bit of a snobbish feel to it that rubbed me the wrong way at times. Rating: G
Rebecca14 reviews6 followersFollowFollowFebruary 19, 2014I bought this book with the impression that it would be a more in-depth look at teaching young boys the ways of being a gentleman, but realistically this book was very, very fundamental. For anyone who is interested in etiquette, even if only remotely, these fundamentals would have not only been taught already, but known. Therefore, this book may be best suited primarily for those who are incredibly new to etiquette and manners. I gave it three stars because much of my review is more subjective. Objectively, the layout of the book was disappointing. It reminded me of a spelling bee: each chapter summarizes it's points, then [briefly] elaborates them, then spells them out in bullets again at the end. Subjectively again? I think this book would serve better as a child's book, rather than as a parenting book. 
Kara29 reviewsFollowFollowJuly 8, 2008I couldn't tell at times if the author was trying to be funny or if she was just a little uptight about what she considered to be polite behavior. It was interesting to read though, and I learned a couple things that I didn't know before.
Edy Gies1,372 reviews10 followersFollowFollowJuly 21, 2014It was very instructiveand full of good ideas and information. The author came across as quite pretentious at times, but I still would recommend it to anyone looking for a comprehensive manners guide for young men.
Samantha Penrose798 reviews21 followersFollowFollowJanuary 25, 2014Most everything in this book is fairly obvious, and essentially boils down to one simple rule; The Golden Rule.Decent tips are offered to parents for helping your son maintain his gentlemanly behavior in especially tough situations, such as, waiting rooms, airplanes, restaurants, etc.
Cheri69 reviewsFollowFollowApril 12, 2009A very comprehensive book. Well written, easy to read. Wish I would have had this for my boys not just my grandson!
LisaAuthor 4 books10 followersFollowFollowReadFebruary 21, 2012How To Raise A Gentleman A Civilized Guide To Helping Your Son Through His Uncivilized Childhood by Kay West (2001)
Amy48 reviewsFollowFollowJune 5, 2012I will take any help I can get!
Toyka12 reviewsFollowFollowCurrently readingJune 27, 2016Excellent ... must read for anyone desiring to raise a gentlemen.
Hanna392 reviewsFollowFollowJuly 30, 2014Hooray! I'm already practicing 85-90% of this book. Perhaps we need to hand this out to parents of God awful kids. <3Razvan1 reviewFollowFollowReadNovember 11, 2014okDayla68 reviewsFollowFollowMarch 24, 2015Seems like common sense...sadly, it's not anymore. Really liked the bullet points at the end of each chapter outlining basic manners for a couple dozen social situations. I will revisit those!
Jovan Johnson23 reviews1 followerFollowFollowReadJune 3, 2009this book has inspire me read every book at schoolBrandon Benson12 reviews6 followersFollowFollowCurrently readingNovember 4, 2010Been reading for long timeAmani1 reviewFollowFollowReadNovember 17, 2018ÀDisplaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
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How to Raise a GentlemanKay West
3.59Want to ReadShop this seriesRate this bookHow to Raise a Gentleman is an invaluable resource for parents whohope their little boys will grow up to be the kind of men who know which fork touse, how to treat others, and will generally make their parents proud. How to Raise a Gentleman focuses on real-life topics such being agood sport, play dates, and - especially for boys - "personal belching, boogers, and scratching." The book- GenresParentingNonfictionReferenceSelf HelpFamily
214 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2001
Book details & editions24 people are currently reading311 people want to readAbout the author
Kay West
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3.595 stars32 (23%)4 stars42 (30%)3 stars44 (31%)2 stars15 (10%)1 star5 (3%)Search review textFiltersDisplaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviewsZak Boston152 reviews10 followersFollowFollowDecember 29, 2024A bit light on instruction and a bit heavy on description, but entertaining and some quality advice throughoutIn the modern age of men who are not gentlemen and women who are not ladies, this reminder of basic decorum is well putSome highlightsBe consistentDo not give in to temper tantrums If the tantrum is public, take him to another room or outsideDo not respond with similar behavior, do not hit him to stop him from hittingDo your best to not raise your voice in angerIf you lose your temper with your child, apologizeAccept apologies gracefully and quicklyDo not correct other children on their mannersCorrect in private, celebrate in publicDo not promise rewards for good behavior, instead give a treat upon a successful episodeGive your son tasks and involve him in decisions to the degree he is physically or mentally able as soon as he is able and no soonerLet your child know when a discussion has become a decisionBe a gracious loser and a generous winner Do not respond to rudeness with rudenessGive more than you are askedTake less than you needLeave a place nicer than you found itMark McElreath139 reviews3 followersFollowFollowDecember 28, 2024"How to Raise a Gentleman" points out what should be clear and accepted behavior for young men. From navigating sports fields to written correspondence, West covers key events and skills every young gentleman should seek to master. The work does feel redundant, as many of these lessons are universally understood, but in a day where common sense is not so common, it may be best that it is written down. Karisa377 reviews11 followersFollowFollowJuly 5, 2018A thorough, humorous guide to raising gentlemen. My only beef is that the author only had one son! And when she wrote this, her son was still young, so the jury wasn't out yet on whether he'd become a gentleman or not. I think the book would've had more power if it had been written by a veteran mom who'd successfully raised several boys into gentlemen. This book captured the image of WHAT a young gentleman looks and acts like, but I was often frustrated wanting answers about HOW to make that happen. Agency is in play, unfortunately-- I could talk to my 3 boys until I'm blue in the face about what a gentleman does, but since that isn't their goal, they could care less.B-right110 reviewsFollowFollowNovember 24, 2012 As a gentleman, I must thank the writer for putting together these honorable pieces. When I started, I first taught it was a book meant for kids and not for grown up singles like me but have made me more a gentleman as I practice some few tips from it. Am now on my way to getting 'how to raise a lady' since I will soon be a father.Thank you Mrs. West.Trace1,031 reviews39 followersFollowFollowFebruary 16, 2014With my highlighter in hand, I've underlined lots of areas where I can see my son will need a bit more practice in. I felt that this book was filled with examples of gentlemanly behaviors but a bit short on practical suggestions for practice and implementation... Still - I think it will prove to be useful to our family. - 2014-booklist
Daryl Ngo49 reviewsFollowFollowOctober 19, 2015A manual that every adult needs to read because not only children could learn from this but adults too. Whether you're planning to be a parent or not, this is 101.Megan2,754 reviews13 followersFollowFollowJanuary 9, 2020This is largely helpful, if rather succinct, advice on raising a child to have good manners. To be honest, very little of it has to do with that child being male; it’s worthwhile for any human. It seems more relevant for a younger child, but it can still be helpful for any parent. West manages to keep all her talk and advice about proper manners grounded in real life. DaShannon1,299 reviews34 followersFollowFollowJune 6, 2025This is a great book about etiquette and manners to impart to our sons. It includes information for toddlers as well as older sons. Dining, friends, girlfriends, culture, social interactions, sportsmanship, and lots of other areas are covered. - non-fiction
Tuấn Ngô1 reviewFollowFollowApril 17, 2021To my son: read it, boy.Ashley Castillejo1 reviewFollowFollowDecember 20, 2025A fun and easy to read book. Witty, honest, and heartfelt. It reminds us of how we should treat people in this life, and when or if I have kids someday, that they can learn these valuable lessons. Elena673 reviews18 followersFollowFollowApril 30, 2021A book on manners and comportment, this book goes into various topics such as teaching the basics (please, thank you, excuse me; using Sir, Miss, etc) to proper introductions, greetings, and leavings, to respectful behavior while in public areas, the ins and outs of playdates, sleepover, and birthday party manners, dining out, traveling, telephone manners, good sportsmanship, written correspondence (thank you cards), and temper tantrums. There are some helpful tips and overall good recommendations for training your son to be a respectful gentleman. I didn't get way too much out of it because most of the book included topics addressed in a similar book I read last fall (that I preferred to this one) called Connoisseur Kids by Jennifer Scott. I felt like that book was a bit more practical for the younger years that I find myself with my son and included a ton of fun activities to help teach the manners whereas this book just felt like a long, tedious list of dos and don'ts with a bit of a snobbish feel to it that rubbed me the wrong way at times. Rating: G- unread-bookshelf
Rebecca14 reviews6 followersFollowFollowFebruary 19, 2014I bought this book with the impression that it would be a more in-depth look at teaching young boys the ways of being a gentleman, but realistically this book was very, very fundamental. For anyone who is interested in etiquette, even if only remotely, these fundamentals would have not only been taught already, but known. Therefore, this book may be best suited primarily for those who are incredibly new to etiquette and manners. I gave it three stars because much of my review is more subjective. Objectively, the layout of the book was disappointing. It reminded me of a spelling bee: each chapter summarizes it's points, then [briefly] elaborates them, then spells them out in bullets again at the end. Subjectively again? I think this book would serve better as a child's book, rather than as a parenting book. - etiquette
Kara29 reviewsFollowFollowJuly 8, 2008I couldn't tell at times if the author was trying to be funny or if she was just a little uptight about what she considered to be polite behavior. It was interesting to read though, and I learned a couple things that I didn't know before.Edy Gies1,372 reviews10 followersFollowFollowJuly 21, 2014It was very instructiveand full of good ideas and information. The author came across as quite pretentious at times, but I still would recommend it to anyone looking for a comprehensive manners guide for young men.- non-fictionparenting
Samantha Penrose798 reviews21 followersFollowFollowJanuary 25, 2014Most everything in this book is fairly obvious, and essentially boils down to one simple rule; The Golden Rule.Decent tips are offered to parents for helping your son maintain his gentlemanly behavior in especially tough situations, such as, waiting rooms, airplanes, restaurants, etc.- parenting
Cheri69 reviewsFollowFollowApril 12, 2009A very comprehensive book. Well written, easy to read. Wish I would have had this for my boys not just my grandson!LisaAuthor 4 books10 followersFollowFollowReadFebruary 21, 2012How To Raise A Gentleman A Civilized Guide To Helping Your Son Through His Uncivilized Childhood by Kay West (2001)Amy48 reviewsFollowFollowJune 5, 2012I will take any help I can get!- relationships
Toyka12 reviewsFollowFollowCurrently readingJune 27, 2016Excellent ... must read for anyone desiring to raise a gentlemen.Hanna392 reviewsFollowFollowJuly 30, 2014Hooray! I'm already practicing 85-90% of this book. Perhaps we need to hand this out to parents of God awful kids. <3Razvan1 reviewFollowFollowReadNovember 11, 2014okDayla68 reviewsFollowFollowMarch 24, 2015Seems like common sense...sadly, it's not anymore. Really liked the bullet points at the end of each chapter outlining basic manners for a couple dozen social situations. I will revisit those!Jovan Johnson23 reviews1 followerFollowFollowReadJune 3, 2009this book has inspire me read every book at schoolBrandon Benson12 reviews6 followersFollowFollowCurrently readingNovember 4, 2010Been reading for long timeAmani1 reviewFollowFollowReadNovember 17, 2018ÀDisplaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviewsJoin the discussion
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