'I Attended My Own Funeral' - BBC Three

Why are more and more people choosing to hold a funeral while they're still alive?

It’s now possible to attend your own funeral. Yes, really. But would you want to?

Holding a ‘fake’ funeral can help to get a fresh perspective on life, face up to the inevitability of death and, in the case of those suffering from a terminal illness, give people a chance to say goodbye to loved ones. Oh, and just maybe listen to all the nice things people might say about you when you're gone. And, according to funeral celebrants,, external it’s a practice that’s gaining popularity in Britain.

Holding a live funeral (a funeral where the star of the show is still living) has already taken hold in South Korea and also in Japan (where it’s called seizenso)., external Could our interest in these ceremonies be a sign of a shift away from death being taboo? If so, it may be a positive thing for our mental health - a 2009 study, external found that thinking about death for five minutes per day, for just one week, reduced depressive thoughts.

The rise of living funerals is part of a bigger shake-up of mourning culture. People are moving away from traditional religious ceremonies to consider alternatives such as eco funerals, with some funeral parlours now offering biodegradable coffins, external. Earlier this year, Hollywood star Luke Perry was buried wearing a "mushroom suit". It's a special outfit made from organic cotton and mushrooms which the suit's makers claim can "reduce the body's toxic pollutants which are often released into the environment during decomposition and cremation".

You can even hire a “funeral wrecker",, external someone paid to turn up to funerals with messages from the dead (sometimes vengeful, such as telling people to leave, sometimes funny or loving).

This is in stark contrast to the strict rules around death and funerals that became especially rigid during the Victorian era. Back then, customs included, external the need for mourners to wear all black for an extended period of time, depending on their closeness to the individual - widows, for example, were expected to spend two years dressed that way – and decline social gatherings for a year. Mourners would often also keep a snippet of the deceased’s hair, or wear specific mourning jewellery.

David Williamson, the Spiritual Care Lead at St Leonards Hospice in York, is planning to introduce living funerals as a service to patients later this year. “I’m ordained in the Church of England and I’ve done funerals for 30 years,” he says. “I've always been amazed at the tributes that friends and relatives give to the person who's died and I often ask them, ‘Did you ever say that to the person when they were alive?’. And quite often they'll say no. So I've always wondered, is there a better way we can express what we think and feel about people when they are alive?”

He has found that in a culture like Britain’s, which is traditionally quite emotionally reserved, living funerals can “free people up to let their emotions out without feeling embarrassed or awkward”.

Georgia Martin, 28, started organising living funerals on a voluntary basis after an emotional moment at her grandfather’s funeral. “I remember seeing his friends there and feeling so sad thinking, ‘he would have loved to see all these people. Why didn’t we arrange this when he was alive?’.”

One year on, she has arranged six living funerals and says that while each one is different, she thinks they help both the dying and their families with acceptance. In her view, they have the edge over a traditional funeral where the guest of honour is, of course, dead.