Raw Dogging: The Truth About Unprotected Sex With Women

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There are two big downsides to going bareback on girls: pregnancies and infections. But nobody talks about the upsides. What’s the truth about unprotected sex?

In my article last week on how to best please women, I mentioned having unprotected sex as a pleasure booster and devotion inducer. When you shag a girl raw, and especially when you cum in her, all other things being equal (i.e., the sex itself, and the experience of it, are also just as good), the experience for her (and for you) tops anything you can achieve with a condom on.

Contents

1. The Downsides of Raw Sex

1. Sexually Transmitted Diseases
2. Unplanned Pregnancies

2. What’s Good About Bareback

1. Motivation
2. Trust/Devotion
3. Pleasure

3. Can You Limit Raw Dog Risk?

1. How to Screen for Risk
2. How to Avoid Pregnancies
3. How Do You Get Raw Sex?
4. Are You Special?

4. Wrap Up

I also mentioned this was not an endorsement or a recommendation, and that you’d better know the risks. And that the risks for it aren’t minor (diseases and pregnancy being the Big Two).

We had a few readers ask for more on the topic in the comments of that article, however. One comment was:

“How are we having sex with these girls raw with no consequences? Lol How do we get girls to have sex raw with us? How do we know if she does this with everyone or not? How do we know we’re special ? How do we know she’s clean How do we not get her pregnant How many girls would you advise we do this to? I’m really curious, I love raw sex, but my safety is more important”

Another reader requested a proper article on having sex raw.

So, I’m going to give you the politically incorrect truth about raw dogging women – including women you’ve just met. Because there’s a lot of good information in the sex education you’ve had, but it had one problem: it went heavy on the fear, and light on the benefits.

We’ll talk both today.

Do you know what the most popular term to describe the act of ‘sex without a condom’ is?

We can take a look at Google’s most searched terms to find out what people type in to find this.

It isn’t ‘go bareback’. It’s not ‘raw dog’ or ‘au naturel’.

It is ‘unprotected sex’.

It’s curious when an act is defined by what it is not. In this case, this sex act is defined, by a large share of the population, as ‘not protected’. That makes it sound rather dangerous, doesn’t it?

Terminology affects how you perceive things. And if you allow things to be labeled by their opposites, you cast them in a far darker, less sympathetic light.

For instance, in the abortion debate, the side that is in favor of abortions casts their opponents as ‘anti-choice’. The side that is against abortions casts their opponents as ‘anti-life’. Obviously no one wants to be against choice, or against life. Fortunately for each side, their marketing efforts for their side’s labeling have been successful enough that the folks who like abortions are referred to as ‘pro-choice’ and the folks who do not like abortions as ‘pro-life’. Each side is defined by what it is for, instead of what it wants to take away.

There’s been no such marketing campaign for sex without a condom. But there has been a large one to encourage condom use.

There are reasons for this. Campaigns aimed at changing behavior usually don’t target nuance; nuance doesn’t change minds at scale. They aim to inspire emotion. In this case, fear. Fear of what will happen to you if you don’t wear a condom.

Is that fear reasonable? Or unreasonable?

Let’s have a look at the real downsides of raw sex first, before we talk about the upside.

Sexually Transmitted Diseases

Not fun when you’ve got a bumpy member.

Most of the guys I know well go raw on girls a lot. But most of the guys I know well are good with girls, and most guys who get good with girls sooner or later grow cavalier about condom use... almost without fail.

From looking at themselves, as well as at my own self, I can tell you a few things:

• The really nasty STDs are not as common as you might think

• Minor STDs are a lot more common than you might think

• Many of the most common STDs aren’t prevented by condoms

• You cannot perfectly predict which girls are clean and which aren’t

One buddy of mine experienced burning while he urinated, and began to get some discharge. He went to the doctor and learned he had gonorrhea. He had to let a friends-with-benefits he’d been having sex with raw know, plus inform a few other girls he’d recently slept with without condoms. At first he was stumped where he got it from. His FWB wasn’t seeing anyone else (she said), and he thought the other girls were safe.

He eventually figured out whom his gonorrhea came from: a ‘girl next door’ type he’d known and crushed on for ages and had finally slept with about four months back. He’d figured she was safe; she was cute and wholesome and it took him (a guy who did quite well with women) a long time to get her. So she must be fine, he assumed, and went raw. Next stop: gonorrhea.

Of the guys I’ve known with skin-transmitted STDs (like herpes and molluscum), most of the time they’ve picked these up while wearing condoms – not going bareback. In fact, it seems like at least some of the time this is a trigger for guys to stop caring about condoms: “Well shucks, I got this despite wearing a condom. What’s the point of wearing these things then?”

The really bad STDs (HIV, syphilis, hepatitis) are pretty hard to get if you’re a non-drug-injecting, not-homosexual man. HIV and hepatitis require fluid transmission into your body, which means unless you have an open cut/sore on your penis during sex, you’re unlikely to pick it up from raw dogging a girl. (that said, the science on this isn’t exactly settled yet, so don’t take it as gospel. Note I said ‘unlikely’, not ‘impossible’)

Unpleasant STDs, like gonorrhea and herpes, are easier to pick up and more common. And unfortunately, you can get these even with condoms on (though you’re a bit less likely to contract herpes with a condom on, and a lot less likely to contract gonorrhea with one on).

I won’t go too much more into STDs in this article; we’ve covered them in-depth already and I don’t want to cover too much familiar ground. If you want a bunch more info on STDs (and how to protect yourself from them), read my article on the subject here:

• How to Avoid STDs Even If You Have Lots of Sex

Keep this in mind though: if you go bareback on girls enough, you will get STDs.

Heck, if you have enough sex with enough women, even with condoms, you will get STDs anyway. But if you aren’t using protection, the number of STDs you’ll get will be higher.

Unplanned Pregnancies

This conversation never gets old.

The other major risk of unprotected sex, of course, is you knock this chick up.

Children are a wonderful, beautiful thing, and they’re something you’re statistically likely to have at some point in your life (85% of Westerners will reproduce).

However, you do not want to have them when you are young, broke, still figuring out what you will do with your life, and/or aren’t even sure this gal is a gal you’d like to keep around (let alone sire progeny with).

Having a child is a big deal. Unless you will be a dead-beat dad and run away and never pay child support, you’re going to be on the hook in some way. Either paying out a monthly chunk of your income, or financial support plus active involvement in your son’s or daughter’s life. It’s very, very important you screen for the qualities you want in a potential mother to your future children before you go impregnating anybody.

Not doing this is how you end up knocking up some plain-looking chick with a room temperature IQ and the ambition of a tree sloth whom you picked up one night at the bar and dumped your baby batter into because you were drunk and she looked so good with all that makeup on and her hair done nice. And now you’ve got Junior on the way... only, rather than a kid with good looks and a high IQ and an awesome personality, you are going to get a kid who is half you mixed with half of this girl who is not nearly on your level. And some chunk of your time and energy will forever go to this child, instead of to children you spawn with women superior to her. Or you may even get sucked into wifing her up, and producing a bunch of subpar kids.

Unplanned pregnancies are really bad, unless they happen to be with beautiful, intelligent women with sparkling personalities (so you get beautiful, intelligent children with sparkling personalities). Then maybe not so bad. But still potentially bad – if you don’t have your education and career set up yet, your progress may slow significantly as you divert time and money and other resources into a child rather than reaching a career milestone where now you have money-making skills and enough funds coming in it’s easy to afford what you need to be able to afford for children.

Likewise, a girl who seems beautiful, intelligent, and all-around wonderful to you now may not seem that way in a few years, assuming you are not already very good with girls and will be improving over time.

If you’re just beginning your journey with dating, don’t lock yourself in thinking you’ve found your best option right out of the gates.

I know too there is a push in some parts of the manosphere online that men should be having children young. This is idealism, however (or perhaps men who live in rural parts of their countries and/or have already established great careers or income streams).

If you examine countries by age at first marriage, you will notice that, in general, the more advanced a country is, the higher its age at first marriage. Big developed countries like America [29.2 for men], Russia [27.4], and China [25.8] being somewhat lower than smaller developed countries, like Sweden [36 for men], Chile [35.3], and South Korea [32.6], since big countries have much larger rural areas, where life is slower and people marry sooner; smaller countries have a higher percentage of their population in very developed parts of the country than larger countries do. This is not just a modern trend; the average age at first marriage for a Roman man 2,000 years ago was 30 (for women it was 23).

Why do men in advanced societies marry at later ages? Because marriage is about producing and rearing children, and you are not ready to produce and rear children until you’ve learned most of what you need to to establish a real career and asset base, and in advanced societies that doesn’t happen until you’re in your late 20s or early 30s.

Unless you live in the country, or in an undeveloped region, your learning curve and development curve to get to where you need to be to be an established, productive member of society is going to be longer. You do not want to interrupt that curve before you’ve reached a point where you are able to rear children without retarding your ability to make money and improve your (and your children’s) lot in life.

This is the real risk of an unplanned pregnancy: that it’s often bad for you, bad for the mother (who also is likely to get ‘stuck’ somewhere before she was finished her learning curve), and it brings a child into the world in a less advantageous position than a child born later.

Those risks established, how likely are you to knock a girl up shooting up in her?

It seems to depend somewhat on the guy. But if your sperm count is normal, and if this girl is attracted to you and excited for the sex, it is pretty darn easy to make girls pregnant.

It happens easy, and it happens fast. It doesn’t take much sex for girls to get your baby in them. Especially at the start of the relationship, during that honeymoon phase (when they are super excited to be having sex with you, and their bodies are doing everything they can to unite your sperm with their eggs), or during the other times couples are most likely to go raw (breakup sex, makeup sex, sex after not having seen each other for a while, sex where the parties are about to separate for a while, etc.).

You must be aware that the times you will most want to go bareback on a girl and ejaculate into her, and the times she will most want you to do this, tend to be – not coincidentally – the times she is most likely to conceive.

You may not want that consciously. She may not want that consciously. But unconsciously, both of you are trying to make a baby together. That’s what sex is for, after all, isn’t it?

This is very important to bear in mind:

• Pregnancy is very easy to happen when she is very attracted to you

• When she is most fertile, you will have a strong desire to cum in her

• When she is most fertile, she will have a strong desire to have you cum in her

The more attractive a man you are, and the more of an emotional roller coaster you take women on, the easier babies happen if you are going raw and cumming in girls.

And babies when you are not ready for them – or with a girl who can’t give you the gene mix you want for awesome offspring – is typically not such a good idea.

Now that you’ve been thoroughly apprised of the very real and life-changing risks of condom-less sex, let’s talk about the upsides. These are the benefits of sex without a condom – which you won’t hear in those sex ed classes. They are:

1. You become a lot more motivated to have sex
2. You inspire a lot more trust and devotion in your girl
3. You get a lot more pleasure

Pleasure is the only one commonly discussed. It’s the one we’ll spend the least time on here (because it’s sort of self-evident).

Instead, our big focus will be on the other two effects: motivation and trust/devotion.

Benefit #1: Motivation

It’s amazing the level of clarity and mission-focus you get when you know you’re going raw on this girl.

I first began to experiment with barebacking girls when I was about intermediate with women, and on a plateau. I was picking up girls from bars for one-night stands and I was getting first-date sex not infrequently with women I asked out. But I was still having dry spells, and was also running into motivation issues.

I wasn’t as motivated to go out anymore at that point as I had been when I was a beginner. I also often got girls back to my place, on my bed, making out, with them giving me minimal resistance, only for me to not be aroused and say to myself “Eh... I’m not really feeling it” and give up on the escalation too easily. Or sometimes I would get a girl completely naked and ready for sex, but I was in my head, thinking about the escalation instead of the sex, and couldn’t focused on the act to get hard enough to put a condom on. The idea of condomed sex – after all that work to finally get her nude! – was just too, well... boring.

Then I started to hang out with a couple of naturals with high notch counts. And I quickly picked up on how cavalier these guys were about condoms. I’d ask them about condoms, and I’d get answers ranging from “Eh, I use them sometimes” to “I always use them. Unless the girl seems really innocent” (but then you’d find out about 40% of the guy’s lays were with girls he considered ‘really innocent’).

So I experimented. First it was “Next time I can’t get it up for a cute girl, I’ll start raw”, and I never had an erection problem again.

Next it was “If a girl seems innocent enough / likely to be clean enough to me, I’ll go raw”... and man, that did wonderful things for my motivation. It also helped narrow my target selection; picking up became much more of a focused exercise for me. I was only going to get together with her if:

1. I thought I’d be able to / would like to go raw on her, or

2. I didn’t think it’d be too hard to have sex with her with a condom

Most beautiful girls, young girls, and innocent girls all went into Category A. Even if they were harder to get, my motivation for them was still high because I had a very clear picture of the conquest in my head. And when your motivation is high, you can move mountains with women (and get girls you wouldn’t otherwise have gotten).

On the other hand, if a girl struck me as sexually experienced, she went into Category B. I was definitely going to use a condom with her, which made me want sex with her less. But if she was easy to get I’d still go for her (if she wasn’t, I’d quickly move on).

Ultimately, I had to somewhat adjust this system. Because unprotected sex is exciting and motivating and awesome... and once you give yourself permission to bang girls without a condom, you find yourself on a slippery slope (pun partly intended).

What happened with me is while I started off making a clear distinction between girls I’d wear condoms with and ones I’d let myself not worry about that with, the lines began to blur. I’d pick up a girl where my thoughts throughout the courtship would be “This girl is beautiful, but there’s no way I can have sex with her without a condom”, but then once we were back in the bedroom that would shift into “This girl is beautiful. It’s probably okay to have sex with her without a condom”, and then I’d have this big internal debate with myself and sometimes the condom side would win out and I’d slap a rubber on, and sometimes the cavalier side would win out and I’d give it to her raw.

It ended up being sort of like my drunk driving days. Nothing too bad ever happened to me, but I got close enough enough times to something bad happening that eventually I said “If I keep this up, bad things will happen”, and I adjusted my habits.

There is no denying it though; if you know you’re going to go bareback on a girl (or going to try to), your motivation to bed her goes through the roof.

There is just something far more primitive, motivating, and focusing about knowing you’re going to get inside this girl – really inside her.

Benefit #2: Trust/Devotion

When there’s nothing between you, the trust, connection, and devotion goes through the roof.

Sex with condoms on is just so... sterile. So clinical.

There is an implicit message in condomed sex of “I don’t trust you.” If you did trust her, of course, why would you put a sheet of latex between your intimate parts and hers?

There is another implicit message of “this sex doesn’t really mean anything.” Because, again, if it was about a meaningful connection, you would not be trying to have something between you and her. You would be trying to be as close to her as you possibly could – i.e., her naked flash wrapped around your naked flesh.

And there is a third thing about it that sucks. And that is that it introduces a conscious, calculating aspect into what is supposed to be a passionate, romantic, unthinking affair. That you have the presence of mind to put a condom on tells her she is not as special to you as she’d like to imagine she is. Another aspect of this ‘calculating-ness’ is that you are either trying to protect her from yourself (you’re a bit white knight-y), or protect yourself from her (you’re a bit of a germophobe). Neither of these (white knightery or germophobia) are particularly attractive to girls.

It’s still fun and you can still get off. But it is not the same as shagging a girl raw. And its effects on her and your psychology are worlds away.

When you go bareback on a girl, the message she gets includes:

• I completely trust you
• I go for what I want
• What I want is you
• I’m not worried about germs or white knighting
• This sex is a meaningful, romantic act

Now... the question of how important these are is one of magnitude. If you’ve picked her up for a one-night stand, and you’re never going to see her again, it doesn’t really matter too much if you wear a condom and it seems lower trust, more calculating, and less meaningful. She sort of expects that anyway... unless you really gave her a romantic, passionate seduction (in which case she may actually be quite disappointed if you put a condom on).

The more ‘into’ you a girl is, the greater the magnitude of wearing or not wearing a condom will be on her. If she is extremely into you and you wear a condom, there’s a chance it really makes her feel bad/slighted/maligned, depending on how sexually experienced she is and what her feeling toward condoms is.

A girl’s expectations of condom use also affect her reaction to your use or lack of use of a condom. Women with higher educations tend to be more careful about condom use, for instance. They tend to date more educated men, who are more careful about condoms, and they have their own career paths they are on and are warier of the consequences of unprotected sex. If a woman has expectations you will use a condom, she is not as put off when you do, and has more reservations about it when you don’t. Likewise, if she expects you to not use a condom (more common with less educated women, as well as with most women who are super into you), she will have many fewer reservations about you going into her raw, and a greater negative feeling about you putting a condom on.

I know guys who’ve had girls refuse sex with them until they got condoms (hasn’t happened to me, for reasons I’ll discuss below). I’ve also known guys who’ve had girls who refused sex with them unless they took the condom off.

In general, the benefits of un-condomed sex are as noted above: trust, meaning, and passion (calculation-free). These benefits make it much more likely a girl will throw herself into things with you; the sex is more passionate, her feelings toward you blossom, and she falls in love harder and with greater devotion.

This is doubly true when you ejaculate into her. The big reason why, I believe, is simply what this communicates to her: you are pretty darn sold on her, to be ejaculating into her. If you are so cavalier about that, she assumes you are also saying, in a way, “I’d be cool with having a kid with you.”

Which is a tremendous mix of closeness, validation (you’re telling her she is valuable enough to you to reproduce with), and openness/vulnerability. That’s intoxicating.

Of course, it’s also coupled with the risk that you may well actually knock her up.

Benefit #3: Pleasure

Can’t beat the sensation of it.

It feels a lot better to go raw on girls than it does to wear a condom.

It’s better from a physical standpoint (flesh feels better than latex). And it’s also better from a psychological standpoint:

• There’s conquest (“I am penetrating this girl with my naked cock”)

• There’s risk (“I am taking a risk [disease, pregnancy] raw dogging this girl”)

• There’s closeness (“I am so close to her right now... there is nothing between us”)

• There’s supremacy (“I am more memorable to her than her former, condom-adorned lovers”)

• There’s taboo (“I am not supposed to shag girls raw... but I’m doing it anyway”)

• There’s ‘realness’ (“I am actually shagging this girl herself – it is not me shagging a balloon that happens to be inside a pussy”)

All these elements (and others) feed in together to create a spike in your enjoyment. Likewise, she is having some or all these thoughts at the same time, spiking her enjoyment as well.

The net result is sex without a condom is better from a pleasure perspective than sex with even the best condoms is (though I know some guys swear by ribbed condoms, or those with vibrating rings that fit around the base of the penis – I’ve had a few guys tell me they like those better than raw... though it seems like they usually drift back toward raw anyway eventually).

Let’s get to the questions of our reader. First, let me get these two questions out of the way:

1. “How are we having sex with these girls raw with no consequences?”
2. “How many girls would you advise we do this to?”

#1 – you’re not. Of course there are ‘consequences’. Like anything we discuss on this website, we are discussing probabilities. The probability you catch a disease is at least 2x to 3x higher without a condom (or even higher, for fluid-based STDs like chlamydia and gonorrhea), and the probability you make a girl pregnant is probably 50x to 100x higher without a condom.

Sex is a dirty, sloppy act where the mucous membranes of two biological organisms come into contact so that the male can inseminate the female to attempt to reproduce with her. The closer you get to not blocking the contact of mucous membranes and not stopping the male from inseminating the female, the more risk you will have that the purpose of sex (i.e., reproduction) occurs, and the higher the risk is you will be exposed to pathogens that piggyback on sex to spread from host to host.

#2 – zero. I advise you to do this with zero girls. Always use a condom. Use a condom until at least three months into a relationship with a girl, then go get tested for STDs together. When the test comes back clean for you both, you can consider not using condoms. Even then, you should still pull out (i.e., not ejaculate inside her), and make sure she is on the birth control pill. Do everything you possibly can to not get sick and not have unplanned pregnancy. That is my advice.

I would normally not say “Do as I say, not as I do.” But I am a much more careful person in most things than most people I encounter. I’ve been able to avoid any terrible results from barebacking, mostly because I am a careful guy. Most men, in my experience, are not as careful as I am. And heck, even for me, I’ve had some near-misses; one pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage, for instance, that probably would’ve been bad news for me had it gone to term.

However, bearing in mind that you are always at higher risk going raw than using protection, and with the understanding that I am not advising you to go raw – I am giving you facts and perspectives you cannot get anywhere else, so that you can make an informed judgment for yourself, rather than having authority figures tell you what to do without giving you full information – let’s talk about how you can limit your risk when going raw.

How to Screen Girls for Risk

Screen her well before you go skinny dipping in her bay.

First off, there is no surefire way to know a girl is clean.

I’ve picked up stuff from girls I was confident had to be totally clean. I thought my read was right, but it wasn’t. Nothing permanent, fortunately, but it is never nice to find out you’ve picked something up.

And of course, remember my friend with gonorrhea too; he thought he was sleeping with a safe, quiet girl next door, and instead he got a nasty STD that forced him to call a bunch of other girls he’d slept with and tell them hey, sorry about this, but you’re gonna have to go get checked and probably get on antibiotics.

That said, I’ve been pretty good at avoiding problems overall (despite a few blips here and there). My general screening process takes into account a few things:

• Age
• Race
• Beauty
• Education
• Background
• Lifestyle
• Where we met

Here’s how that works for me:

• Age. The older a woman is, the more likely she is to have longer-lasting or permanent STDs, like the skin-transmitted ones (herpes, HPV, molluscum, trichomoniasis) or diseases like hepatitis. Younger women who have recently become sexually active are more likely to have gonorrhea and chlamydia (peak age is 15 to 24).

• Race. Black women have the highest STD risk (somewhere between 5x-10x higher risk to 30x higher risk of syphilis gonorrhea than whites, depending on the study, for instance [5-10x may be the more recent data; discussion in comment section]) and out-of-wedlock pregnancy rate. White women are between black women and Asian women, though closer to Asians than they are blacks. Asian women are the lowest risk partners. Latinas are between whites and blacks; Latinas of Caucasian background are closer or equal to other whites, whereas Latinas with more black or Native makeup are closer to blacks. Among Asian girls, East Asians (light skinned) are lower risk than Southeast Asians (dark skinned).

• Beauty. Beautiful girls have fewer partners, engage in less casual sex, and, in general, tend to be lower risk. The less beautiful she is, the higher risk she is.

• Education. The more educated she is, the safer she is (lower STD and pregnancy risk).

• Background. If her parents are divorced, she’s higher risk. Her father’s education level determines some of her risk level, as does her relationship with her father (the better her relationship with him, the lower risk she is). Her socioeconomic status impacts how high or low risk she is. How old she was the first time she has sex is a big indicator of how risky she is (the earlier she starts, the more partners she has, and the riskier her sex is; girls who had sex for the first time between ages 10 and 14 are hugely risky compared to girls whose first sex was after 17). Women with broken backgrounds and/or who grew up poor are much higher risk than women from other backgrounds.

• Lifestyle. What does she do for fun? If she takes solo trips abroad or girls-only trips abroad, she’s higher risk. If she goes out to bars and clubs and parties a lot, she’s higher risk. If she has a lot of male friends and few female friends, she’s higher risk. If you know she hooks up a lot, or has a laissez-faire attitude toward sex, she’s higher risk. If she is anything other than heterosexual (i.e., she’s bisexual, a former lesbian, pansexual, she’s into horses, whatever it is, so long as she also sleeps with men), she’s higher risk.

• Where we met. If you meet her in a bar, nightclub, lounge, or party environment, she’s higher risk. You’re probably not the first man she’s gone home with from such an environment, and when people drink (as people tend to do in those environments), they also wear condoms much less. i.e., you’re not the first guy to stick himself in her without a condom. If you meet her at any sort of place people go to meet other people (Meetup groups, networking events, happy hours, etc.), likewise; when she is someone who actively goes out specifically trying to meet people, she’s higher risk.

I factor all these things together to come up with a rough idea about a girl’s general risk profile.

For instance, if she’s a very pretty 19-year-old white girl from a middle class still-together nuclear family, going to a good university, who doesn’t party, and her lifestyle is generally pretty tame, and I meet her on the sidewalk when she’s on her way to a study group, I figure she’s probably safe to bareback.

If she’s a cute 19-year-old white girl from a middle class now-divorced family, at an okay university, who parties sometimes, and she has a lot of guy friends, and I meet her in a café, I’m unlikely to bareback her. She has a few things to her advantage (she’s young; I met her in a café – pretty tame environment), a bunch of things that place her at middle risk (she’s only cute – not beautiful; she’s white; she’s middle class; she’s at a university, but just an okay one), and some things that increase her risk profile quite a bit (her parents are divorced; she parties sometimes; and she has a lot of guy friends).

We’ve talked a lot on Girls Chase already about how to screen girls for various things, and there’s a fair bit of overlap with this. If you need guidance on how to screen better, check out these articles:

• Book Excerpts: What to Screen Women For
• How Many Partners Has Your Girlfriend Had? Find Out Here
• Her Raw Material or Your Relationship Skills: Which Matters More?

How to Avoid Pregnancies

Don’t assume she’s trying to avoid a pregnancy as hard as you are.

With girlfriends, natural family planning (i.e., fertility awareness) works well if you are careful and you don’t rely entirely on the girl to tell you when her periods begin and end.

There are a few ways to do this; the most accurate is reading physiological signs. But unless you want to be taking her temperature and measuring the position and mucus levels of her cervix, this method is impractical.

The next best way is calendar-based.

The thing to understand is that women have a few days during the month when they can become pregnant. The highest percentage days are actually a few days before they begin ovulation, with a tail a bit before and a bit after ovulation:

My preference is for the Standard Days Method. Which works by not cumming in girls during the 11 days they can become pregnant, and only ejaculating in them during the infertile part of their cycle. Those days work out like this:

Note that this only works for women with regular menstrual cycles; i.e., menstrual cycles that happen between 26 to 32 days. If a woman has an irregular menstrual cycle, this method does not work, since you can’t time when her ovulation will be, and in any event she becomes semi-fertile before ovulation actually begins. (in my experience, women with irregular menstrual cycles are either super stressed or have some kind of health problem)

What I do with girlfriends is track their menstrual cycles (you can do this with a spreadsheet or a notebook) and stop ejaculating in them at Day 7 in the cycle, and start back up again at Day 20. I’ve used this method for years, and never had an accident with it (accidents have only happened to me when I went off-method).

It’s important you observe when she is on her period and make a note of it yourself. Most girls don’t know exactly how long their cycles are, and don’t even track when their periods start and end. On top of that, if you rely on asking girls what their cycles are, they may ‘forget’ on purpose, or outright lie; never underestimate what women will do to get you cumming in them when they are fertile!

If they like you a lot and think you’re a keeper, they are going to do what they can to have that baby with you.

The easiest way to track yourself is as soon as you note she’s on her period, ask her “When did your period start?” The day she tells you it began is Day 1 of her cycle. Whenever her next period begins, that’s Day 1 of her next cycle. After a few months, you can be fairly confident she’s on a regular cycle (but you should still keep checking with her every period in case this changes; if she gets stressed or falls on ill health, it may).

This method is not 100%. There are various studies suggesting its efficacy is anywhere from 95% if done perfectly, to 88% as it’s actually used in practice, to lower (some studies suggest much lower than 88%). For me, anyway, it’s worked well.

When you’re during the part of her cycle where she can become pregnant, you just switch back to condoms, or you pull out, or ejaculate somewhere else other than her vagina (i.e., cum in her her mouth or her bottom). The rest of her cycle, blast away.

The one caveat: extreme romantic excitement causes eggs to release. The science is still in debate on this, but I’ve seen it enough times to feel confident telling you it’s real. If you have passionate sex with her after a huge fight, or you have incredible break-up or make-up sex, or you rail her brains out right before you leave for a long trip or just after reuniting with her after a lot of time away, especially if there was a lot of anticipation on her part – buildup where she is up late at night dreaming about your cock in her, or fear where she thinks she may lose you forever – her body goes into “Get pregnant by this man NOW!” mode.

This is some of the best sex you will ever have too, and your body too will be saying “Impregnate this chick!” regardless what your rational brain may have told you to do or not do earlier.

In these cases, it does not matter if it’s an infertile part of her cycle. If there’s been a lot of drama, buildup, and anticipation, she will release eggs to capitalize on a man who is a scarce resource (i.e., you are coming, or going, or might leave forever). Her body wants to become impregnated now by this man she has judged worthy to sire her offspring. This is both an attempt to keep him (I’ve seen a lot of guys turn from ‘guy on the way out of the relationship’ to ‘husband’ as a result of makeup/breakup/reunion pregnancies) and to secure good genes she’s spent months or years vetting, and might otherwise not get a chance to gene-mix with if this man really does leave for good.

One-Night Stands and Flings

tfw that chick you hoped to never see again texts you she’s pregnant.

What about hookups, you ask? How do you avoid pregnancies there?

The long and short of it is you can’t. You’ve just met the girl; you don’t know where in her cycle she is. Depending on how and where you meet women, and your style/presentation (i.e., what kinds of girls you attract), there is a good chance a larger number of the women you pick up may be fertile.

My personal observation is it is easiest to impregnate a girl a few weeks to a month or two into a sexual relationship with her, and it is not as easy to impregnate her your first night together with her (even if she is fertile). I’m only drawing from the experience of myself and maybe 15 guys I’ve observed over the years, however, so I don’t know how reliable that data is. I’d love to see some science done on it (even if proved me wrong. At small sample sizes like the one I’m working from, it’s hard to know if what you’re seeing is the larger trend, or if your results are outliers)... if you’re a sexologist and you need a provocative research topic, “chance of impregnation during unprotected one-night stands” would be amazing to see (as would a whole suite of studies on the odds of impregnation under the various scenarios discussed in this article).

If this is accurate, my guess is the reason is because a woman doesn’t settle into “sold on him and ready to receive his child” mode until she’s converted; she needs to switch from “this guy might be okay” to “wow this guy is incredible and I am in love” first.

But it might not be accurate. And in any event pregnancies still do happen off one-night stands, and they’re not that uncommon.

So, you proceed at your own risk here.

Good general rule: don’t dump loads in girls you’d be upset with if they got pregnant.

If you’d freak out if this girl you’re banging told you she was pregnant with your kid, don’t ejaculate in her. Put a condom on, or cum on her belly, breast, face, or in her mouth or her anus. Not in her vagina.

How Do You Get Raw Sex?

Some girls are happy to have sex with you raw. Some girls will insist on it. Or at least beg you not to put a condom on. I have had girls take the condom out of my hand and toss it away on our first night together.

Other girls will try to get you to wear one. The most common way a girl will do this in my experience is to ask “Aren’t you going to wear a condom?” if it looks like you’re not about to. I personally always have a condom at the ready my first time with a girl, even if I don’t think I’ll wear one. It’s there in case I change my mind (and decide “I’d better use one with this girl”) or in case she requests it. At least for me, if a girl asks if I’m going to wear one, both to avoid any conflict and out of respect to her, I will wear one – at least our first time together.

I do have a few tricks you can use to more easily have sex raw, however.

The first is to get yourselves both nude, and take out a condom packet and have it in your hands. But climb on top of her and place your penis either on her pelvis right above her vaginal opening, or you can even rub the head of your penis against her clitoris as you open the condom package. Often at this point girls will just grab your penis and shove you inside them without the condom. It’s sexy as hell, and you’re pretty blameless (I mean... you tempted her, but it was her who shoved you in).

The second is to treat the condom request like standard last-minute resistance, and simply deflect it. The way I do this is like so:

[going for sex]

Her: Aren’t you going to wear a condom?

You: [whispered sexy voice] Next time. Next time I will. Right now I just want to feel you.

If she’s adamant about condoms she may still push back. But often this is enough to get a girl on board with letting you come aboard... without a raincoat on.

And of course, there’s always the old reliable ‘just the tip’ approach. Tried and true.

How Do You Know If You’re Special?

You’re not special.

If she does it with you, she does it with other guys. Doesn’t matter how awesomesexylicious you are (or think you are). She did it with other guys too. Probably some you’d see and be like “Ew. THAT guy? Really? Why?”

Unless she was a virgin or very inexperienced before you. Then maybe you’re the first. But perhaps not even then.

Welcome to reality, where Disney and all those feel-good messages from people who want you to buy their junk does not apply ;)

How’s that for a double entendre?

All right, now you’ve got some info to work with here.

Most likely, you were hoping I would either tell you:

1. It’s okay to have sex raw. Don’t worry, nothing bad will happen! Just do this one thing. OR:

2. You should never raw dog girls. Don’t do it. Just wrap it up, otherwise you’ll get a diseased dick and a bunch of low quality bastard children

The truth is it’s more nuanced than that. You have no way to know for sure if a girl has an STD, or if she can become pregnant. You have tools you can use to get a good rough idea that she’s more likely to be clean, or (in the case of a girlfriend) that she’s not fertile at the moment.

But these tools just give you a certain probability, and they aren’t 100%.

Using condoms cuts your STD risk by a lot (but not completely), and cuts your pregnancy risk almost completely. Not using condoms raises both risks.

However, there are some big benefits to going bareback on girls, too. Namely:

1. Motivation (you’ll be a lot more motivated if you know you’ll shag raw)
2. Devotion (you’ll both feel a lot closer to each other without the latex)
3. Pleasure (it feels way better)

There’s a slippery slope you can get onto once you give yourself permission to bareback girls. Often you’ll start with fairly strict rules about raw dogging, that get stretched and expanded over time until you become cavalier about strapping up. You can reign yourself back in at times, though you’ll typically see with most experienced guys, the more sexually experienced a guy gets, the less he uses condoms – it’s very hard to go back to using them all the time once you’ve given yourself the freedom to go without.

You can limit your risks from unprotected sex somewhat. You will never get to “zero consequences” and I don’t advise you to go raw. At the same time, I assume you’re an adult and you can make your own decisions; and that a more-informed adult is in a better place to do so than a less-informed one.

There are a variety of factors you can use to screen women for risk. The ones I use are:

• Age
• Race
• Beauty
• Education
• Background
• Lifestyle
• Where we met

What’s most important is not to screen by only a single measure. I had one friend tell me “Asian girls are safe to go bareback on; they’re clean” only for him later to pick something up from one of his Asian lays. I’ve picked up some truly beautiful girls with truly messed up backgrounds here and there; there’s a certain temptation to go raw on a girl that beautiful, but you know if you do, well, 30 other penises already beat you to the punch going raw on the same girl before you, leaving who-knows-what behind for you to ‘discover’. And the crazier the girl is, the more likely she is to try to rope you into something (say, with a pregnancy) – one of the commonest features of screw loose women is fear of abandonment, which they will try anything and everything to avoid.

To avoid pregnancies, you can try the Standard Days Method if – and only if – the girl in question has a regular menstrual cycle between 26 and 32 days. If she doesn’t, this method doesn’t work. If she does, great – but you need to check every month when her period begins. If you don’t, it’s easy for her to ‘forget’ (purposefully or not) and suddenly you are ejaculating into a vagina with a 30% or higher conception chance.

I hope this gives you some more, useful perspective on a sometimes-tricky topic.

Lots of not-P.C. stuff here, of course. Above all, I hope that however you use this information, you use it responsibly – don’t hurt the girl, don’t cause problems for her, and don’t cause problems for yourself.

Raw sex is the best sex: it’s a wonderful, incredible thing – it’s one of the things you were born to do. But in an advanced society like ours, it also behooves you to not jump into knocking chicks up right away, and you also probably don’t want to pick up a bunch of diseases (and then spread those diseases around like free surprise ‘bonuses’ to whatever girl you sleep with once you’ve got ‘em).

So, you’ve got the info. You know how this stuff works now, and you know the risks.

Be smart, be safe, be responsible. And have fun with your women.

In life, there are no sure things. Only worse and better probabilities.

Chase

Chase Amante

Author

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System. Ready to learn from Chase directly? Find out more here.

   

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