What Does It Mean When A Man Is Vers? | Metro News

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What does it mean to be vers?
(Picture: Erin Aniker for Metro.co.uk)

Vers is a term used for men who don’t have a position preference when they have sex with other men.

It’s short for the word versatile and means men don’t mind being a top (meaning the person penetrating) or bottom (the person being penetrated) during sex.

The term began as shorthand in gay chatrooms but is now used in real life and on dating apps.

In a nutshell, it’s having the best of both worlds. Why limit yourself?

There’s an assumption that men who have sex with men fit neatly into being a top or bottom, and that their preference in the bedroom reflects on who they are and what their role in a relationship is like.

Gay men who bottom are sometimes assumed to be the ‘woman in the relationship’ (which isn’t accurate. If two men are in a relationship, neither of them are ‘the woman’), or shamed for being weak or submissive.

While everyone has preferences, the idea of vers is that the part you play in intercourse isn’t limited to a binary and you can enjoy different aspects of it. It’s about not being limited to just one role.

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Even people that vers men have hooked up can find the concept difficult to grasp and may assume they’ll be on top/bottom every time just because they were the previous time. That can mean vers people get shoehorned into being a top or a bottom.

Unfortunately, vers men also still have to deal with bottom-shaming.

In addition to that, not having just one role in sexual positions can make people assume that they don’t have an established role in the relationship.

But we know that isn’t the case – a vers person simply enjoys giving and receiving. And why not?

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