Why Do I Feel Guilty All The Time? | Psych Central

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Psych CentralSubscribeWhy You Might Feel Guilty All the Time: What to Do About It

Medically reviewed by N. Simay Gökbayrak, PhD — Written by Katie Stiles and Christie Craft — Updated on April 22, 2022

What is excessive guilt?
Why you might feel guilty
Effects of excessive guilt
Related conditions
How to stop feeling guilty
Next steps

Everyone feels guilt now and again. But when excessive or persistent guilt affects your daily life, there are strategies that can help.

Marble statue man covering his face with hand — Kutredrig/Getty Images

Everyone makes mistakes and there are some situations when feeling guilty is appropriate. Learning from missteps and moving on with the hope that you can right your wrongs or make better decisions in the future is a common human response to guilt or remorse.

But if you find yourself asking, “Why do I feel guilty all the time?” you may be caught in a mindset of excessive or persistent guilt.

Feeling guilty all the time can contribute to developing anxiety and depression, but there are ways to manage these feelings so they don’t get in the way of living your life as you want to.

What is persistent or excessive guilt?

Guilt is an emotion that comes from how your actions affect those around you. Most of us rely on our understanding of right and wrong — our conscience — to stay in line with our morals, ethics, and values.

You may feel guilty when doing something that doesn’t live up to your own standards and values. And while feeling guilty can be agonizing, it does serve a social purpose.

The memory of feeling guilty may remind you to act respectfully or morally and “do the right thing” in the future.

But feeling guilty all the time is not productive and may be called persistent or excessive guilt.

Making mistakes is part of being human. With excessive guilt, ordinary feelings of remorse or guilt are magnified and can seriously affect many aspects of your life.

Possible reasons for feeling guilty all the time

Guilt is unique to each person, so there are many reasons why you might feel guilty all the time.

Guilt usually comes up when you act or think in a way that goes against:

your beliefs
family values
social norms
workplace ethics

Effects of excessive guilt

Persistent and excessive guilt may contribute to:

low self-esteem
feeling like you aren’t a good person
excessively worrying about others’ perceptions
sensitivity to criticism
weak or poor boundaries
a betrayal of personal values or core beliefs
feeling overwhelmed by simple decisions

Related conditions

Because excessive guilt can leave you ruminating on “should haves” and “could haves,” it can contribute to developing certain mental health conditions, such as:

Anxiety disorders. Persistent worries or fears are a feature of anxiety disorders, which can lead to feelings of guilt. Guilt itself can also lead to anxiety symptoms, including racing thoughts, feelings of unease, and physical symptoms like rapid heart rate and difficulty breathing.
Depression. Feeling guilty all the time may lead to low mood or depression. Depression can involve low motivation and a lack of interest in things you used to enjoy, weight changes, poor concentration, sleep issues, and feelings of hopelessness.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). Excessive guilt may contribute to or worsen existing OCD, including intrusive thoughts or obsessions that lead to unwanted behaviors or compulsions.
Dysphoria. Dysphoria is a profound state of unease, dissatisfaction, or unhappiness that can accompany anxiety and depression. Signs of dysphoria include fatigue, apathy, unease, and worry. Negative, unhelpful thinking can also be related to dysphoria, leading to an unrealistic outlook on life and your future.

If you already live with anxiety or depression, you may also be more likely to experience excessive feelings of guilt.

How to stop feeling guilty all the time

If guilt is challenging for you, there are ways you can manage these unhelpful feelings.

Self-help strategies

Consider these steps to cope with feeling guilty all the time:

Identify your triggers for guilt. Figuring out when you feel guilty and why can help give you some clarity. Are you responsible for what you feel guilty about? Or are you feeling guilty because of something you don’t have power over?
Practice self-awareness. You can become more self-aware if you start considering those times when you’re thinking you “should have” or “could have” done something differently. Are these thoughts based on your beliefs and values? Or are they based on what you think society, family, or friends expect of you?
Write it out. Journaling may help you gain insight into your emotions. It can also help with your self-awareness and naming your triggers.
Talk it out. If something you’ve done — or think you have done — is weighing heavily on you, having an open conversation with the person you feel you’ve wronged might lift a great weight from your shoulders. If you can’t talk to that person directly, you could talk to a friend about it.
Practice self-compassion. Maybe one of the most important strategies is practicing self-compassion. Everyone messes up and wishes they would have handled situations differently sometimes. Being unkind or cruel to yourself can’t change the past. You’re only human.
Learn from your mistakes. You can take any mistakes that bring on guilt and learn from them. Learning from experiences can help you not repeat your mistakes, creating a cycle of mistakes and excess guilt. You can always do things differently in the future with knowledge from the past.

Mindfulness

Adding a mindfulness practice may help you gain greater self-awareness and self-compassion when dealing with your guilt.

Staying present in each moment can also help you slow down and make balanced decisions so you feel less guilt later on.

Therapy

Talking with a mental health professional can also help you address persistent guilt. If you’re still feeling guilty all the time after trying some of these steps, consider reaching out to a professional.

A therapist can help you:

work through your guilt
notice and manage triggers
learn to let your values inform your decisions and actions, rather than guilty feelings

Support groups

Support groups can offer you an option for talking to peers about feelings of guilt. It can often be incredibly helpful to talk with people who have similar experiences in order to heal and grow.

Next steps

Dealing with guilt is not always easy. Having constant, excessive guilt can feel agonizing. But if you’re feeling stuck, you’re not alone.

There are many ways you can learn to manage your guilt, such as:

self-help strategies
mindfulness
talk therapy
support groups

If you’re ready to get help but don’t know where to start, check out Psych Central’s guide to finding mental support.

6 sourcescollapsed

Anxiety disorders. (2017).https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Mental-Health-Conditions/Anxiety-Disorders
Clay RA. (2016). Don't cry over spilled milk — The research on why it's important to give yourself a break.https://www.apa.org/monitor/2016/09/ce-corner
Depression. (2018).https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/depression
Luck T, et al. (2020). Feelings of guilt in the general adult population: Prevalence, intensity and association with depression.https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33295786/
Miceli M, et al. (2018). Reconsidering the differences between shame and guilt.https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6143989/
Tilghman-Osborne C, et al. (2012). Inappropriate and excessive guilt: Instrument validation and developmental differences in relation to depression.https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4119797/

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Medically reviewed by N. Simay Gökbayrak, PhD — Written by Katie Stiles and Christie Craft — Updated on April 22, 2022

Guilt vs. Shame: How Are They Different?
Why Personal Boundaries are Important and How to Set Them
Tips to Soothe Your Worries of What Others Think of You
How to Challenge Negative Self-Talk
What Is Psychotherapy and How Does It Help?

Why Do I Feel Guilty All The Time? | Psych Central

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What is persistent or excessive guilt?

Possible reasons for feeling guilty all the time

Effects of excessive guilt

Related conditions

How to stop feeling guilty all the time

Self-help strategies

Mindfulness

Therapy

Support groups

Next steps

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