PRO Courses Hot Guides Tech Help Pro Expert Videos About wikiHow Pro Upgrade
QUIZZES All Quizzes Hot Love Quizzes Personality Quizzes Trivia Quizzes Taylor Swift Quizzes
EDIT Edit this Article
EXPLORE Tech Help ProAbout UsRandom ArticleQuizzes Request a New ArticleCommunity DashboardTrendingForums Arts and EntertainmentArtworkBooksMoviesComputers and ElectronicsComputersPhone SkillsTechnology HacksHealthMen's HealthMental HealthWomen's HealthRelationshipsDatingLoveRelationship Issues Hobbies and CraftsCraftsDrawingGamesEducation & CommunicationCommunication SkillsPersonal DevelopmentStudyingPersonal Care and StyleFashionHair CarePersonal Hygiene Quizzes Love Quizzes Personality Quizzes Fun Games ForumsArts and EntertainmentFinance and BusinessHome and Garden Relationship QuizzesCars & Other VehiclesFood and EntertainingPersonal Care and Style Sports and FitnessComputers and ElectronicsHealthPets and Animals TravelEducation & CommunicationHobbies and CraftsPhilosophy and Religion Work WorldFamily LifeHolidays and TraditionsRelationships Youth
LOG IN
Log in
Social login does not work in incognito and private browsers. Please log in with your username or email to continue. FacebookGooglewikiHow Account No account yet? Create an account
RANDOM
Home
Random
Browse Articles
TrendingNew
Quizzes & Games
All QuizzesHot
Love Quizzes
Personality Quizzes
Fun Games
Dating Simulator
Learn Something New
Forums
Courses
Happiness Hub
Explore More
Support wikiHow
About wikiHow
Log in / Sign up
Terms of Use wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Learn why people trust wikiHow
Categories
Health
Psychological Health
Emotions and Feelings
Happiness
11 Heartwarming Ways to Cheer Up a Girl When She's Sad Download ArticleExplore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Text her encouraging messages throughout the day. 2 Ask questions about how she’s feeling. 3 Listen to her. 4 Validate her perspective. 5 Offer to help her. 6 Give her a hug. 7 List all the reasons that you like her. 8 Distract her with something funny. 9 Cook her some yummy food. 10 Give her a small gift. 11 Plan an activity that you know she'll enjoy. + Show 8 more... - Show less... Other Sections Related Articles References Written by Connell Barrett | Edited by Madeleine Criglow
Last Updated: October 6, 2025 References
Download Article X
This article was written by Connell Barrett and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Criglow. Connell Barrett is a Relationship Expert and the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City. Connell has over five years of experience as an international coach who helps men connect with women by unlocking their best, true, most confident selves. He is the author of the Amazon bestseller “Dating Sucks but You Don’t,” and has appeared on Good Morning America, the "Today" show, Access Hollywood, and in Best Life, Cosmopolitan, and The Oprah Magazine. In 2019 he was named Datezie.com's “New York City’s Best Male Dating Coach." There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been viewed 253,665 times.
It's hard to see the people that you care about feeling sad, especially when you don't know what to do to make them feel better. Thankfully, there's a lot you can do to help lift someone's spirits. If a girl that you're close to is having a difficult time, try out these tips to help her see things from a more positive perspective.This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach, Connell Barrett, founder of Dating Transformation. Check out the full interview here.
What to Do When Your Girlfriend Is Sad
Ask her how she’s feeling and if she’d like to talk about it. If she says no, let her know you’re there if she changes her mind. If she says yes, listen to what she tells you and offer a validating phrase like "Wow, that's a lot to deal with."
Steps
1
Text her encouraging messages throughout the day.
Download Article
Send some positivity her way. It may seem small, but that extra dose of hope can really help someone feel happier no matter what they're going through. Text her that you hope she's having a good day or that you can't wait to see her when you're both off from work. If you can't think of the right words, send an encouraging GIF or a YouTube clip from her favorite TV show.[1]XResearch source
If you have some extra time on your lunch break, text her, "Hey hope your day's been great so far :)"
Send her a motivational meme along with the message, "You can do this!"
Send her a GIF of a cute kitten with the caption, "Thought you might appreciate this. Can't wait to see you later today!"
Advertisement 2
Ask questions about how she’s feeling.
Download Article
Give her the space to vent and process her emotions with you. Oftentimes, people who are sad just need some time to talk about their feelings in order to cheer up. Ask if she would like to talk about whatever happened that's made her sad or how she's feeling about it all now. If she says she's not ready, tell her you're always there if she changes her mind.[2]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
If you notice that she seems upset, say something like, "Hey, are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?"
Maybe you noticed that she was sad in class today. When you get home, text her, "Hey, just wanted you to know that I'm always here if you need anything. Is everything alright?"
WIKIHOW ORIGINAL RESEARCH “Ugh, you’ve had a bad day. How can your partner help?” 64% “Be waiting at home with open arms. Sometimes a hug is all you need.” was the most popular answer among wikiHow readers. Based on 26,827 votes Last updated 08/13/2025 Take the quiz → 3
Listen to her.
Download Article
Make an effort to hear her perspective. Make direct eye contact, nod your head as she speaks, and reflect on what she says to develop a deeper understanding.[3]XResearch source Try to limit any distractions while you talk by putting your phone away and turning off the TV.[4]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
To reflect on what she's just told you, say something like, "Man, this sounds like it's been a really upsetting experience" or "It seems to me like you've been put through a lot the past couple of days."
You can also ask follow-up questions to learn more about her point of view. Try, "How are you feeling about the experience now?" or "What have you been doing to get through this?"
Advertisement 4
Validate her perspective.
Download Article
Knowing that your feelings are valid is a huge help in feeling better. Make an effort to empathize with her perspective in conversation, and directly express that you understand why she would be feeling so upset. Even if she's sad about something that you haven't experienced before, try to put yourself in her shoes and imagine how she may be feeling. Knowing there's someone out there that understands her will likely ease her feelings of sadness.[5]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
Use reassuring, empathetic statements, such as, "I completely understand why you would feel that way" or "That's totally valid. I'm so sorry that happened."
5
Offer to help her.
Download Article
Ask if there’s anything that you can do to make her feel better. Your offer alone will make her feel cared for and hopefully cheer her up, and there may be specific things you can do to make her feel happy again. She may need advice or simply some time to vent.[6]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
When you notice that she's sad, say, "I'm so sorry you're feeling down right now. Is there anything I can do to help?"
Alternatively, text her, "I know things have been hard lately. Let me know if there's anything I can do to make things easier."
Avoid giving advice or trying to solve the problem before asking her first. Sometimes when people are sad, it's more helpful to just be there for them while they talk through their feelings. She might not be looking for specific solutions.[7]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
Advertisement 6
Give her a hug.
Download Article
If she's comfortable with it, comfort her with physical affection. When you hug someone that's upset, their body responds by producing oxytocin. This hormone can immediately make a person feel a natural high that lifts up their mood. If the girl you're with is sad, ask if she would like a hug or see if she would like your arm around her shoulder.[8]XResearch source
If she says no, respect her answer and help her feel better in alternative ways. There are so many ways to make a person feel happier, and physical affection is only one of them.
Reader Poll: We asked 555 wikiHow readers how they’d like their partner to comfort them when they’re feeling down, and 56% of them agreed that the best gesture is giving them a sweet hug or tender touch. [Take Poll]
7
List all the reasons that you like her.
Download Article
A little encouragement can help her tackle what's making her sad. First, think about all the reasons that you like her, and focus on more than just her looks. This could include her sense of humor, her generosity, or her knack for always picking the best restaurants. After you've thought of a good list, tell her why she's so awesome next time you see her in person, or send over a text.[9]X Trustworthy Source HelpGuideNonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
Text her something like, "Hey, just thought you should know that I think you're the coolest girl in the world. You always know how to make me smile and you're the most generous person I know."
Advertisement 8
Distract her with something funny.
Download Article
Make her laugh to get her mind off of what's upsetting her. Before you start cracking jokes, make sure that you think she'll be receptive. Wait until after she's vented a little or expressed that she doesn't want to talk about it. Once you get the go-ahead, tell jokes that you know that she'll like, send hilarious memes her way on Instagram, or bring over a comedy that you know she loves.[10]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview You can also try:[11]X Trustworthy Source HelpGuideNonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
Talking about funny memories that you've shared
Blasting her favorite songs and dancing around until she starts laughing
Telling her a funny story
9
Cook her some yummy food.
Download Article
A good meal can lift someone's spirits. Cook her favorite dish and show up at her house at dinnertime to surprise her. If you're not much of a cook, order some food from her favorite restaurant instead. Stay over for the meal so she has someone to spend time with over dinner.[12]XResearch source
If she's really upset and not feeling up to dinner, try making her a calming cup of hot tea instead.
Advertisement 10
Give her a small gift.
Download Article
Bring over something small to cheer her up and show her that you care. Instead of something flashy or expensive, think of something that you know she will like. Even if it won't change what she's upset about, a gift from someone that cares about her will brighten her day.[13]XResearch source
If she likes comic books, buy a few comics or a graphic novel that you think she will enjoy. Attach a note that says something like, "Great comics always make me think of you. Hope you enjoy them!"
Maybe she's a big music fan. Make a playlist of uplifting tunes to help cheer her up.
If you're low on funds, try something small like her favorite candy bar or a mini bouquet of flowers.
11
Plan an activity that you know she'll enjoy.
Download Article
This will help get her mind off of things for a while. Once she's talked through how she's feeling, she may need a distraction to cheer her up. Ask if she'd like to do something fun to help out with that. If she says yes, take her out to the movies for the night, go mini-golfing, or spend time at a park and enjoy a beautiful day in nature.[14]X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating CoachExpert Interview
If you're not sure what to do, ask her if there's anything she'd like to try. Make it clear that you're open to doing anything that would make her feel happy![15]X Trustworthy Source HelpGuideNonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
Advertisement
Expert Q&A
Search Add New Question Ask a Question 200 characters left Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Submit Advertisement
Tips
Submit a Tip All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published Name Please provide your name and last initial Submit Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
You Might Also Like
13 Thoughtful Ways to Comfort Your Girlfriend When She's UpsetHow toComfort Your Girlfriend when She Is UpsetHow toCheer up Your GirlfriendHow toMake a Girl Happy over TextHow to Calm and Comfort a GirlHow toMake a Girl Happy when She Is AngryHow to Make a Sad Person Happy: Tips for Cheering Them UpHow toComfort Your FriendHow toCare for Your Upset BoyfriendHow toComfort a Girl on Her Period over TextHow toMake a Friend HappyHow to Cheer Someone Up with Words & Actions11+ Ways to Support and Cheer Up Your Boyfriend When He's SadHow toComfort Your Sister when She Is Crying Advertisement
Written by: Connell Barrett Dating Coach This article was written by Connell Barrett and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Criglow. Connell Barrett is a Relationship Expert and the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City. Connell has over five years of experience as an international coach who helps men connect with women by unlocking their best, true, most confident selves. He is the author of the Amazon bestseller “Dating Sucks but You Don’t,” and has appeared on Good Morning America, the "Today" show, Access Hollywood, and in Best Life, Cosmopolitan, and The Oprah Magazine. In 2019 he was named Datezie.com's “New York City’s Best Male Dating Coach." This article has been viewed 253,665 times. 61 votes - 74% Co-authors: 9Updated: October 6, 2025 Views: 253,665 Categories: Featured Articles | Happiness In other languages Portuguese Dutch Spanish French Indonesian Vietnamese Hindi Czech Japanese
Print
Send fan mail to authors
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 253,665 times.
Reader Success Stories
Stef
Jun 3, 2022
"I am so happy I came across this site! It helped me so much, my girl went from sad to happy in a few minutes! Thank you so much for these great tips!"..." more
More reader stories Hide reader stories Share your story
Did this article help you?
Yes No Advertisement Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Written by: Connell Barrett Dating Coach 61 votes - 74% Click a star to vote Co-authors: 9Updated: October 6, 2025 Views: 253,665
Stef
Jun 3, 2022
"I am so happy I came across this site! It helped me so much, my girl went from sad to happy in a few minutes! Thank you so much for these great tips!"..." more
Anonymous
Jul 7, 2024
"Oh my gosh, it really worked! She said she's happy." Rated this article: Share yours! More success stories Hide success stories
Quizzes & Games
What Is My Type of Girl QuizTake QuizWhat's My Dating Style?Take QuizGive the Perfect ComplimentGenerateLove Language QuizTake QuizDoes She Like Me QuizTake QuizHow Happy Am I QuizTake Quiz
You Might Also Like
13 Thoughtful Ways to Comfort Your Girlfriend When She's UpsetHow toComfort Your Girlfriend when She Is UpsetHow toCheer up Your GirlfriendHow toMake a Girl Happy over Text
Featured Articles
Hilarious Clean Jokes That’ll Make Adults & Kids LaughAm I Ready For A Relationship QuizWhy Is He Ignoring Me? 12 Possible Reasons (Plus, What to Do)A Complete Style Guide for the Gamine Kibbe Body TypeHow to Tell if You’re in LoveWhich Chaotic Evil Villain Am I Quiz
Trending Articles
Let Us Rate You 1-10: Attractiveness Scale QuizCan We Guess If You're Single or Taken?How toMake OutAm I a Gigachad or Totally Chopped?How Rare Is My Birthday QuizHow Nonchalant Am I Quiz
Featured Articles
What Does It Mean If Someone Tries to Kill You in Your Dream?200+ Best Questions to Ask Someone You Like (Texting & IRL)How Beautiful Am I Quiz13 Types of Hairlines for Men and Women (And How to Maintain Yours)Which of the 8 Face Shapes Do You Have? Helpful Tips & Style GuidanceMental Illness Test
Featured Articles
How toEnjoy the HolidaysHow to Get 250 Grams of Protein Daily: Best Foods, Meal Plans & MoreAm I Girly Quiz200 Fun, Flirty, & Deep Questions to Get to Know a Guy BetterHow to Tighten Skin Under Your Chin: Natural or Surgical OptionsWhat Would My Nickname Be Quiz
Watch Articles
How toWrap a Round GiftHow toSteam in an OvenHow to Make Plant-Based Meat: 4 Incredible RecipesHow toClean a Silver Necklace4 Easy Ways to Open a Can of SodaHow toPart Your Hair
Trending Articles
180 Good Comebacks & Savage Roasts to Win Any ArgumentAm I a Furry QuizHave I Met My Soulmate Yet QuizRandom Fortune GeneratorWhat Should My Name Really Be QuizWhat Are the Gay Male Body Types (And Which Do You Have?)
Quizzes & Games
How You Can Discover HappinessTake QuizCondolence Message CreatorGenerateEmotional Detachment QuizTake QuizWhat Does My Crush Think of Me QuizTake QuizAre You Best Friends QuizTake QuizWhat Should I Do QuizTake Quiz
Categories
Health
Psychological Health
Emotions and Feelings
Happiness
wikiHow Newsletter You're all set! Helpful how-tos delivered toyour inbox every week! Sign me up! By signing up you are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy.
Home
About wikiHow
Experts
Jobs
Contact Us
Site Map
Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
Do Not Sell or Share My Info
Not Selling Info
Contribute
Follow Us
×
wikiHow Tech Help Pro:
Level up your tech skills and stay ahead of the curve
Download Article Explore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Text her encouraging messages throughout the day. 2 Ask questions about how she’s feeling. 3 Listen to her. 4 Validate her perspective. 5 Offer to help her. 6 Give her a hug. 7 List all the reasons that you like her. 8 Distract her with something funny. 9 Cook her some yummy food. 10 Give her a small gift. 11 Plan an activity that you know she'll enjoy. + Show 8 more... - Show less... Other Sections Related Articles References Written by Connell Barrett | Edited by Madeleine Criglow 
Advertisement 
Written by: Connell Barrett Dating Coach This article was written by Connell Barrett and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Criglow. Connell Barrett is a Relationship Expert and the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City. Connell has over five years of experience as an international coach who helps men connect with women by unlocking their best, true, most confident selves. He is the author of the Amazon bestseller “Dating Sucks but You Don’t,” and has appeared on Good Morning America, the "Today" show, Access Hollywood, and in Best Life, Cosmopolitan, and The Oprah Magazine. In 2019 he was named Datezie.com's “New York City’s Best Male Dating Coach." This article has been viewed 253,665 times. 61 votes - 74% Co-authors: 9 Updated: October 6, 2025 Views: 253,665 Categories: Featured Articles | Happiness In other languages Portuguese Dutch Spanish French Indonesian Vietnamese Hindi Czech Japanese 
Take Quiz
Take Quiz
Generate
Take Quiz
Take Quiz
Take Quiz 
Take Quiz
Generate
Take Quiz
Take Quiz
Take Quiz
Take Quiz 
592 
Send some positivity her way. It may seem small, but that extra dose of hope can really help someone feel happier no matter what they're going through. Text her that you hope she's having a good day or that you can't wait to see her when you're both off from work. If you can't think of the right words, send an encouraging GIF or a YouTube clip from her favorite TV show.[1] 
Give her the space to vent and process her emotions with you. Oftentimes, people who are sad just need some time to talk about their feelings in order to cheer up. Ask if she would like to talk about whatever happened that's made her sad or how she's feeling about it all now. If she says she's not ready, tell her you're always there if she changes her mind.[2] 
Make an effort to hear her perspective. Make direct eye contact, nod your head as she speaks, and reflect on what she says to develop a deeper understanding.[3] Try to limit any distractions while you talk by putting your phone away and turning off the TV.[4] 
Knowing that your feelings are valid is a huge help in feeling better. Make an effort to empathize with her perspective in conversation, and directly express that you understand why she would be feeling so upset. Even if she's sad about something that you haven't experienced before, try to put yourself in her shoes and imagine how she may be feeling. Knowing there's someone out there that understands her will likely ease her feelings of sadness.[5] 
Ask if there’s anything that you can do to make her feel better. Your offer alone will make her feel cared for and hopefully cheer her up, and there may be specific things you can do to make her feel happy again. She may need advice or simply some time to vent.[6] 
If she's comfortable with it, comfort her with physical affection. When you hug someone that's upset, their body responds by producing oxytocin. This hormone can immediately make a person feel a natural high that lifts up their mood. If the girl you're with is sad, ask if she would like a hug or see if she would like your arm around her shoulder.[8] 
A little encouragement can help her tackle what's making her sad. First, think about all the reasons that you like her, and focus on more than just her looks. This could include her sense of humor, her generosity, or her knack for always picking the best restaurants. After you've thought of a good list, tell her why she's so awesome next time you see her in person, or send over a text.[9] 
Make her laugh to get her mind off of what's upsetting her. Before you start cracking jokes, make sure that you think she'll be receptive. Wait until after she's vented a little or expressed that she doesn't want to talk about it. Once you get the go-ahead, tell jokes that you know that she'll like, send hilarious memes her way on Instagram, or bring over a comedy that you know she loves.[10] You can also try:[11] 
A good meal can lift someone's spirits. Cook her favorite dish and show up at her house at dinnertime to surprise her. If you're not much of a cook, order some food from her favorite restaurant instead. Stay over for the meal so she has someone to spend time with over dinner.[12] 
Bring over something small to cheer her up and show her that you care. Instead of something flashy or expensive, think of something that you know she will like. Even if it won't change what she's upset about, a gift from someone that cares about her will brighten her day.[13] 
This will help get her mind off of things for a while. Once she's talked through how she's feeling, she may need a distraction to cheer her up. Ask if she'd like to do something fun to help out with that. If she says yes, take her out to the movies for the night, go mini-golfing, or spend time at a park and enjoy a beautiful day in nature.[14] 
Advertisement Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy.