15 Easy Ways To Be More Charming - Best Life

If you’re under 80 and can pull off a wink without a trace of irony or creepiness, you’re two things: incredibly rare, and incredibly charming. More power to you. Charming people tend to waltz through life with a lilt in their step, pulling off an effortless cool that woos and wows people in every social situation. And you may assume that it’s an innate gift—you either have it or you don’t—but the fact is that, like everything else, having a charming attitude is a skill. Which means it can be learned, practiced, and mastered.

Yes, if you’re looking to be more social, more approachable, or overall more friendly, you’ll have to head back to school—though, blissfully, not literally. With that in mind, we’ve gathered these easy-to-master tips and tricks that are sure to knock the socks off anyone lucky enough to enter your sphere. Consider this your master class in the charm offensive. And for charming of the romantic nature, check out How These 50 Famous Men Wooed the Women of Their Dreams.

1 Use positive observations as icebreakers.

If you really want to turn up the charm, make eye contact. There are few things that say “I’m listening” more than direct eye contact. According to research of Miami University, researchers found that participants who communicated with direct eye contact, rather than an averted gaze, thought more highly of their fellow conversationalist. In fact, participants using eye contact found that their counterpart was more socially savvy and empathetic—two qualities that ultimately charmed them. And for more on charm school etiquette, check out these 20 Social Etiquette Mistakes You Should Stop Making by Age 30.

3 Say less, listen more.

If forgetting names is an issue that you deal with often, it may be time to play the name game. For starters, it’s entirely understandable that upon meeting a crowd of five or more people that your brain begins to shut down after the second person has introduced themselves. When you’re first being introduced to someone, repeat their name back to him or her to emphasize that at least you care enough to remember them. Aside from that, simple tricks using rhyming and alliteration can help you remember Dave as: “Dave Needs a Shave.” It’s not so nice, but he’ll appreciate it when you remember his name at the brainstorm session.

5 Show vulnerability.

Come on, folks—this one should already be a no-brainer. If you’re not treating the one person on the planet who loves you the most with the utmost respect and compassion, then you definitely need to reevaluate a few things in your life. Respect those close to you and others will see you as the kind and compassionate person that you are. For more on reading your partner’s emotions, check out how to Read Your Partner’s Mind with These 10 Body Language Tells.

7 Always look for common ground.

It’s simple—own up to your mistakes. Lying and avoiding your way through life will only make you look smaller to others. Further, coming to the realization that every mistake and setback is a part of you and should be fully embraced, can be truly powerful on its own. Not only will it renew your own confidence, it will make others value your honesty.

9 Respect your waiter