28 Funny Jokes To Tell Your Girlfriend - WikiHow

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Terms of Use wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Learn why people trust wikiHow 28 Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend PDF download Download Article Explore this Article Sections 1 Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend Example Jokes Other Sections VideoWATCH NOW Related Articles References Co-authored by John Keegan and Aly Rusciano

Last Updated: July 27, 2025 Fact Checked

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This article was co-authored by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 1,252,125 times.

Want to make your girlfriend laugh? Whether you’re chatting in person or via text, jokes are a great way to make her smile, impress her, and get her in the mood. From classic dad jokes to flirtatious puns and dirty innuendos, there’s a joke out there for everyone. If you’re not sure where to start, no worries! We’ve put together a list of funny, charming jokes you can text or tell your girlfriend that are sure to make her laugh.

Steps

Section 1 of 1:

Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend

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  1. Step 1 “What did one... 1 “What did one raspberry say to the other? I love you berry much.”[1]
  2. Step 2 “What did the magnet say to the fridge? You’re attractive.” 2 “What did the magnet say to the fridge? You’re attractive.” Advertisement
  3. Step 3 “What did the barista say to their crush? I like you a latte.” 3 “What did the barista say to their crush? I like you a latte.”
  4. Step 4 “What flower is the best at kissing? Tulips.” 4 “What flower is the best at kissing? Tulips.”
  5. Step 5 “Never date an apostrophe. They’re possessive.” 5 “Never date an apostrophe. They’re possessive.”
  6. Step 6 “Is your name WiFi? Because I feel a connection.” 6 “Is your name WiFi? Because I feel a connection.”
  7. Step 7 “What do you... 7“What do you call insects that are dating? Answer: Love bugs.”[2]
  8. Step 8 “How did the telephone ask its girlfriend out? It gave her a ring.” 8 “How did the telephone ask its girlfriend out? It gave her a ring.”
  9. Step 9 “What’s the most romantic ship? Courtship.” 9 “What’s the most romantic ship? Courtship.”
  10. Step 10 “Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.” 10 “Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.”
  11. Step 11 “Knock knock. Who’s... 11“Knock knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!”[3]
  12. Step 12 “Knock knock. Who’s... 12“Knock knock. Who’s there? Kiss. Kiss who? Kiss me!”[4]
  13. Step 13 “Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you stunning!” 13 “Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you stunning!”
  14. Step 14 “Knock knock. Who’s... 14“Knock knock. Who’s there? Cheese. Cheese who? Cheese, you're awfully cute!”[5]
  15. Step 15 “What did the light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on!” 15 “What did the light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on!”
  16. Step 16 “What did the calculator say to the pen? You can always count on me!” 16 “What did the calculator say to the pen? You can always count on me!”
  17. Step 17 “What did the squirrel say to its lover? I’m nuts for you!” 17 “What did the squirrel say to its lover? I’m nuts for you!”
  18. Step 18 “Why did the melons get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe.” 18 “Why did the melons get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe.”
  19. Step 19 “Why shouldn’t you... 19“Why shouldn’t you break up with a goalie? Because they’re a keeper.”[6]
  20. Step 20 “Where do hotdogs go on a date? The meatball.” 20 “Where do hotdogs go on a date? The meatball.”
  21. Step 21 “Why are forks disappointed on Valentine’s Day? They just wanted to spoon.” 21 “Why are forks disappointed on Valentine’s Day? They just wanted to spoon.”
  22. Step 22 “What did the two prunes call their dinner plans? A date.” 22 “What did the two prunes call their dinner plans? A date.”
  23. Step 23 “They say kissing is a love language. Do you want to start a conversation?” 23 “They say kissing is a love language. Do you want to start a conversation?”
  24. Step 24 “You must be a banana because you’re very a-peeling.” 24 “You must be a banana because you’re very a-peeling.”
  25. Step 25 “Ouch! I must have scraped my knee falling for you.” 25 “Ouch! I must have scraped my knee falling for you.”
  26. Step 26 “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” 26 “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
  27. Step 27 “I’m going to arrest you for robbery because you’ve stolen my heart.” 27 “I’m going to arrest you for robbery because you’ve stolen my heart.”
  28. Step 28 “If I could... 28“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.”[7]
    29. Advertisement

Example Jokes

Sample Example Jokes

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References

  1. ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
  2. ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
  3. ↑ https://www.pinkvilla.com/lifestyle/relationships/funny-jokes-to-tell-your-girlfriend-1221406
  4. ↑ https://www.pinkvilla.com/lifestyle/relationships/funny-jokes-to-tell-your-girlfriend-1221406
  5. ↑ https://www.pinkvilla.com/lifestyle/relationships/funny-jokes-to-tell-your-girlfriend-1221406
  6. ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
  7. ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/

About This Article

John Keegan Co-authored by: John Keegan Dating Coach This article was co-authored by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. This article has been viewed 1,252,125 times. 12 votes - 75% Co-authors: 9 Updated: July 27, 2025 Views: 1,252,125 Categories: Dating In other languages Thai Portuguese Czech Japanese
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Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 1,252,125 times.

Reader Success Stories

  • Kim W.

    Kim W.

    Apr 11, 2023

    "I used these jokes on my girlfriend and it worked like a charm. She couldn't stop laughing at the really cute..." more
More reader stories Hide reader stories Share your story

Did this article help you?

Yes No Advertisement Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. John Keegan Co-authored by: John Keegan Dating Coach 12 votes - 75% Click a star to vote Co-authors: 9 Updated: July 27, 2025 Views: 1,252,125 Kim W.

Kim W.

Apr 11, 2023

"I used these jokes on my girlfriend and it worked like a charm. She couldn't stop laughing at the really cute..." more Nadya B.

Nadya B.

May 29, 2023

"As a girl reading this, if you said a joke like this to me it would make my day, they're all so cute <3." Rated this article: Ethan Hollister

Ethan Hollister

May 23, 2022

"The funny jokes helped my crush realize I liked her! We have now kissed and hopefully well start dating!" John Fartone

John Fartone

Jan 20, 2023

"My dearest Elizabeth was swooned by my whimsical use of this marvelous article." Rated this article: Henry W.

Henry W.

Feb 19, 2023

"Thanks a lot! My girlfriend is really getting closer and closer to me!" Rated this article: Share yours! More success stories Hide success stories

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