SOMETHING TO LIVE FOR — Stefan's Choice: TVD 6x15 Review

Stefan’s Choice: TVD 6x15 Review

A couple people were asking for my take on the last Vampire Diaries episode. Have I missed the window of opportunity? I’m a bit late to the party I know.

Oh Stefan. Stefan Stefan Stefan. What a quandary you are my dear fellow. I was equally torn between Stelena and Steroline this episode, which I think is the point. It’s because Stefan was torn between Elena & Caroline. Elena isn’t the only one anymore who’s making the romantic choices.

To be honest, I was a little surprised by Stefan’s reaction at the beginning of 6x15. It certainly seemed to me that Stefan was feeling a whole lotta something post Caroline kiss.

He did the hair swoop, the eye sex and PW’s patented “you just took my breath away” stare. These are calling cards of the Stefan Salvatore Feels.

But then he goes to Damon for advice and we are led to believe Stefan just ain’t feelin’ it. It leads to a rather fascinating exchange with Damon.

Damon: Pull the rip cord. Well, she’s not the one. If she was, you wouldn’t have to ask.

Stefan: Yeah but I didn’t even -

Damon : You’ve been in love twice in your life Stefan. Setting aside that it’s technically the same face, does this feel like that?

Stefan looks down and away.

Damon: Not all love is true love brother.

God I love how Stefan loves Elena.

It is 100% devotion & certainty. Stefan knew, in his bones, that Elena was the one. Their first meeting, their first kiss, their first time, their first everything was EPIC. It was magic. It was lightening bolt through you, light you on fire, LOVE. Stefan never questioned his love for Elena, not for a second. It was quite often the only simple truth he had to hold onto. Stefan & Elena were true love. Pure, simple, honest, selfless, passionate, devoted, true love.

The kind of love you can build a life on.

The kind of love Stefan built his life on.

The last time Stefan felt anything close to Elena was Katherine. Except, Elena had the humanity Katherine was missing. Stefan truly knew Elena. No lies, no tricks, no schemes, no manipulations. Stefan & Elena were honest. Stefan was always crystal clear on who Elena was. He trusted her. He trusted THEM. Elena was certainty in a world of madness. Elena was light in a world of dark. Elena was warmth in a life spent in the cold.

Elena was, quite simply, everything to Stefan.

And then she died.

Beautiful, kind, caring, selfless, real, loving HUMAN Elena died. She chose Stefan and she drowned, dying saving Matt’s life. Dying…while Stefan saved Matt first. Human Elena died the way she lived - selflessly loving others. Putting them before herself. The vampire that took her place is merely a shadow of Elena’s human self. Vampire Elena? She’s not Stefan’s Elena. It’s more than losing her to Damon. Stefan lost Elena…to Elena. To vampirism. To the dark. And no matter how you slice it, Stefan lost the love of his life. He lost his soul mate. He lost his something to live for. He lost THE ONE.

Things would be so much clearer if Elena was really and truly dead. Stefan could truly mourn her and maybe move on…someday. But Elena is still wandering around Mystic Falls. Elena is still alive. She’s just not Elena anymore. There are hints of Human Elena, teeny tiny shreds of the girl Stefan once loved. Sort of like splices of sunlight on a cold, rainy, gloomy day. You crave those splices, their warmth, but they are fleeting. It leaves Stefan in this bizarre world of love limbo. Those splices of sunlight? Those glimpses? They are almost cruel. Because it’s just enough for Stefan to keep hoping that maybe someday Human Elena will return to him. However, it also keeps him from living his life.

So what does Stefan do? Does he mourn Human Elena and try to move on? Or does he hold on to a sliver of hope that maybe someday the girl he loved will find herself again and in return…find Stefan. I don’t think there is a right answer. Either choice is equally understandable. It boils down to two options.

Option 1: If Stefan chooses to devote himself to loving the memory of Human Elena for the rest of his eternal life, I wouldn’t fault him for that. If that was enough for Stefan. If he could continue to be Stefan doing that. What do I mean by that? Well…Stefan Salvatore is the hero of The Vampire Diaries. And the times he’s his truest self is when he is loving someone. Whether it’s Elena, or Damon, or Caroline or Lexi…Stefan sparks to life when he loves. Stefan loved no one more than Elena. That’s why Stefan was his most alive with her. And if that love can sustain him forever, keep his soul ignited forever, I think that’s beautiful. That’s an EPIC love story.

Option 2: Or…does Stefan try to move on? The reality is after Elena turned she made some very definitive choices that separated her from Stefan. In the end she didn’t choose Stefan. She didn’t make Stefan her something to live for. Elena is not building her life around Stefan. She’s building it around Damon. So, is holding onto the the memory of his great love simply holding Stefan back from being…Stefan? From loving again?

Caroline isn’t a lightening bolt. Caroline is not immediate certainty to Stefan. When Stefan looked at Elena he just knew. His relationship with Caroline has been very different from that.

It is something that has grown very slowly, over time. From strangers, to acquaintances, to friends, to best friends, to something…more.

Stefan & Caroline started very differently than Stefan & Elena, but the result is still the same. When Stefan is around Caroline he sparks to life again, because he’s caring for somebody. He’s putting someone else before himself. He’s loving. He’s being Stefan Salvatore.

When I was listening to Damon give advice to Stefan, I started to chuckle a little. I know this is a show about vampires, but honestly…does anyone just date anymore? It might seem a little trite after experiencing a love like Elena’s but why does Stefan have to know NOW? Why can’t he date Caroline? Grab a slice of pizza, maybe a movie. Just see how it goes. I’m just putting it out there.

Candace Accola was my MVP of the week for her performances in 6x14 and 6x15. Watching her try to figure out where she stood with Stefan and how Stefan felt about her, at the most inappropriate time ever (in front of her mother’s casket), was heartbreaking. When she tried to categorize Stefan, offering to name off the categories, it suddenly hit me how innocent Caroline is. The truth is, despite the madness of their world, Caroline has only been a vampire for a few short years. She’s still very much a young woman with a crush.

A girl asking a boy to love her ~ Notting Hill

Stefan has the worst poker face in the world.

Apparently he’s decided that if it’s not love like Elena’s then it’s not worth pursuing. He’s choosing Option 1. And he breaks Caroline’s heart in the process. Because, unlike Stefan, I think Caroline does know.

But something happens to Stefan during the funeral. I have to be honest, I’ve never been a big fan of the Sheriff Forbes and Damon friendship. I could never really get past what Damon did to Caroline when she was human and I found it mind boggling Sheriff Forbes was friends with Damon after that. Also, the scene where Damon goes through Forbes’ cold case files was distasteful to me. When Damon kills people that’s funny? I get TVD moral compass is askew but give me a break. I thought Damon was a bizarre choice for Sheriff Forbes’ eulogy. That being said, I think they did a lovely job tying it directly to Damon’s guilt over his own mother’s eulogy. Damon did pass along Liz’s final words to Caroline and then sang Caroline’s praises. It’s as close to an apology as I think we’ll ever get from Damon. It still falls far too short in my mind, but it’s something.

Damon: You’re mom wanted you to know how proud of you she was. And she should be. You are beautiful, strong woman. A generous friend and a bright light in the dark. She said you were extraordinary. And you are.

As I’m watching Stefan watch Damon talk about Caroline, I started to giggle. Because of course if Damon likes Caroline Stefan will like her too! That’s how these brothers roll!

I kid I kid. It’s not that Stefan didn’t know these things about Caroline. He does. Stefan knows it better than anyone else. But Stefan was over thinking what happened with Caroline. It didn’t feel like Elena, so it must be wrong. It didn’t feel like Elena, so it’s not true love. It didn’t feel like Elena, because Caroline isn’t Elena.

No…Caroline is not Elena. Nor is she Elena Version 2.0. Caroline is her own person, with her own quirks and personality traits. Quite frankly, one of the things I love most about Caroline is that she’s a control freak. I relate. I find the idea of The Ripper, the vampire with no control, paired with ultra controlled Caroline, a very appealing parallel. But…Vampire Caroline has A LOT of the qualities that Human Elena had. A generous friend - a bright light in the dark. Sounds familiar doesn’t it? Elena has a type, a jaw dropping hero, but so does Stefan….kind, warm, selfless and loving. Caroline fits that bill far better than Vampire Elena does. Vampire Caroline is more Elena than Vampire Elena is…at least in my opinion.

That’s what Damon’s speech was reminding Stefan of. No, Caroline isn’t Elena. But she is CAROLINE and he needs to examine his feelings for Caroline based on CAROLINE and who she is...and not who she isn’t. Maybe Caroline can’t compete with a memory, because who ever could, but she is real. She is flesh and blood and real.

So, Stefan has to make a choice. Does he want flesh & blood? Does he want real? Or does he want a memory? Is Stefan going to love a ghost for the rest of his life?

And then…Candace Accola sings. Anyone who can get Paul Wesley to emote his “I’ve just seen Jesus” face, deserves an Emmy because that’s exactly what Caroline’s rendition of “Go In Peace” did.

Here you go…a freeze framed photo of Stefan’s Jesus face. You’re welcome.

To get up and SING at her mother’s funeral showed such profound strength in Caroline that my jaw was on the floor. Stefan understood with perfect clarity the strength, love and devotion Caroline was giving her mom - a final gift, a last goodbye. THAT was the moment of certainty for Stefan. It wasn’t about his memory of Elena. Or what it felt like when he loved Elena. It wasn’t about Elena at all. That moment was just about Caroline and who she is. He wasn’t thinking. Stefan was simply feeling.

I fell in love the way you fall asleep. Slowly and then all at once.

Stefan’s feelings for Caroline have grown slowly over time. But Caroline singing? That was Stefan’s all at once moment. That was the lightening bolt.

Stefan: I think you were wrong about Caroline. I realized I might not be able to explain what I feel for her but it is something. And yeah maybe all love isn’t true love in the messed up way you and I have experienced it. I think that this could turn into something better.

Two of my major life “tenets”’ is that there are infinite kinds of love and romantic love is seldom a straight path. Stefan will never love anyone like he loved Elena. Nor should he. Human Elena will always be Stefan’s true love.

However, allowing himself to move on, to feel whatever he feels for Caroline, doesn’t betray Elena and the love he shared with her. Elena opened Stefan’s heart to love. Stefan continuing to love honors the memory of Human Elena in its purest form. At least to me. It’s just Stefan being Stefan. He’s being Stefan loving the memory of Elena and he’s being Stefan loving Caroline. There is no wrong answer. There’s just what Stefan decides.

Just because his emotions for Caroline feel different than his feelings for Elena, it doesn’t mean they are without value, meaning or purpose. His love for Elena and Katherine is not the only kind of love that exists in the world. Stefan loves Caroline differently than Elena, but that doesn’t automatically mean his love is less. Whatever he builds with Caroline will be different than what he built with Elena. And maybe…just maybe…it can grow to something even Stefan can’t imagine. Something different? Yes. But potentially something wonderful…something better. Not all true love is a lightening bolt, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true love.

And of COURSE Stefan realizes this too late and Caroline shuts off her humanity. Because that’s Stefan’s life on TVD. He’s about to get 5 seconds of happiness and they shove him in the proverbial safe & drown him in the quarry.

Of course they had Caroline shut off her emotions. No character is allowed to become too perfect on TVD. It’s Caroline’s turn to get knocked down a few pegs.

Upside? Caroline broke Elena’s neck. Something I’ve been dying for her to do since about Season 4.

How awesome is this gif? Yeah I’m going to hell. Whatever.

Do I know how TVD is going to end? Hell no. You’re guess is as good as mine. Will Elena become human again? And find the person she once was…Stefan’s Elena? I don’t know…maybe. If that happens, yes, it makes whatever Stefan has with Caroline complicated. At the end of the day, no matter what he feels for Caroline, no matter how much he loves her…Stefan hasn’t stopped loving his true love Human Elena. Nor do I think he ever will. But there’s a difference between loving a memory and loving flesh & blood. If Elena ever becomes a flesh & blood reality again…Steroline is headed for a rocky road. But to be honest…will Elena ever really be the person she once was? No. There’s no erasing the last 3 years. She’ll be changed no matter what. It’ll be complicated for sure.

And you know what? That’s okay. Life is messy. Love is messy. It’s not a straight line - not even true love. But that doesn’t mean any of these characters are suppose to stop living in the interim. Or stop loving.

Stelena is my OTP. If Steroline, like Delena, is just a step in Stefan & Elena’s journey back to one another…I’ll be happy with that. Elated in fact.

But, if Steroline is endgame because Elena ends up with Damon, I’ll be okay with that too.

Why? Because it’s not about winning to me. I think Stefan & Elena already had the perfect love story with the perfect tragic ending.

The Elena she is now…I don’t want that Elena with Stefan. I don’t like Vampire Elena. It’s Human Elena that I loved. It’s Human Elena I wanted to end up with Stefan.

Also, I like Caroline & Stefan.

Some of the best romance stories start from friendship. And like I said - The Ripper ending up with the super controlled Caroline is a beautiful pairing. There’s a lot of good in this ship and I’m very happy with my little row boat if Stelena sinks.

Bottom line? Stefan Salvatore is my favorite character. He’s the reason I started watching and the reason I keep watching. And no matter what his romantic endgame is, the result is the same…Stefan loving. Which is when the character is his truest self.

Side Notes

Have the writers completely forgotten the sire bond? BECAUSE I HAVEN’T. Elena said shutting of her emotions was one of the worst decisions she ever made. Umm…

Elena didn’t DECIDE anything. Damon and his sire bond MADE HER turn off her emotions. What the fuck TVD?

Honestly…watch a damn rerun occasionally.

Elena is the WORST person to convince Caroline to keep her emotions on. Dealing with grief isn’t Elena’s strong suit. Where’s Matt???

Mama Salvatore is BACK!!! Bravo to stefan-is-elenas-lobster She called this like 3 years ago.

There’s nothing cuter than Baby Stefan.

Sometimes I forget how much older Damon is than Stefan. Seeing Damon & Stefan interact was so simple and human. No matter what the resolution is to the love triangle, I ship the Salvatore Brothers until the end.

There’s nothing cuter than Baby Stefan…except maybe Baby Caroline.

BONNIE IS BACK!

BAMON HUG was the hottest thing Damon’s ever done.

These two just need to happen already.

Matt & Tyler join the police training program. Thank GOD. Matt might actually get a storyline outside of the ridiculousness that is Enzo. And…we’ve gotta do something with Tyler. He’s starting to get boring.

I fast forward through the Enzo parts. I just cannot care.

Mar 4.2015 | 111notes - stelena steroline stefan and caroline stefan and elena stefan salvatore caroline forbes elena gilbert tvd 3x15 reviews tvd stelena endgame steroline endgame tvd season 6 review stelena meta steroline meta tvd episode review